Bear Diary

Friday, August 2009, 12

Many people thought that I would have a hard time this week, but I didn't. Instead, I felt that my mind had been very clear and my purpose was very clear these days.It's a good state to keep moving forward without hesitation like this.

Xiaotao knew that I was very busy at work recently, so he thought I was working overtime, so he didn't say much except telling me to take a break.MM Yang made me coffee again this morning, and asked me why I didn’t see anyone in the afternoon recently, and I still looked tired.I said nothing, I was working hard for the life I wanted.She also said that if you have anything to say or if she can help, you can contact her at any time.I said yes, sure.

In fact, this week, I have been doing something unrelated to work without being discouraged - going to Serena's mother's company every afternoon, hoping to have a good talk with my aunt again.It's a pity I haven't been able to see it.The MM at the front desk probably bored me to death, because when I went there on the first day, she still gave me a report with a smile, and then said with a sorry expression that the boss was busy and might not have time to see me.And up to now, the one who entertains me the most is blank eyes.

When I went again today, the MM at the front desk couldn't help but persuaded me earnestly whether I should contact the boss in another way.I just smiled and said as usual, nothing, I'll wait.

It was 8 o'clock when I got home, and I texted Serena, telling him about the interesting things I encountered that day, and how much I missed him.This is my greatest comfort of the day.

I said that I wanted to go home on the weekend, and began to tell my mother and grandma about you slowly, so that they would not be able to accept it for a while in the future.

Serena repeatedly told me not to be as impulsive as I was to his mother.

I said don't worry, I will be careful this time, and hope to take you back with me sooner.

Serena said that his mother would take him to see a psychiatrist on weekends.

I was a little worried and asked if there would be any abnormal treatment?Because I have heard that the so-called cure for homosexuality is to constantly stimulate your body, so that you will naturally have fear and discomfort when you think of homosexual bodies in the future.

Serena laughed and said that I don't know where I heard the gossip, but my mother said it was just talking to a psychiatrist.

I was a little surprised: "You agreed so easily?"

He replied: "Didn't you tell me to be more considerate of my mother's feelings? So I agreed. But I said, 'I promise not that I think there is anything wrong with me, but because I don't want to make you angry. This is the little boy teacher. mine.'"

"Will your mother be angrier when she hears my name?"

"I don't know, it seems not."

"If there is anything you can't accept during the treatment, you must speak out. If your mother still forces you, just tell me, and I will definitely find a way to rescue you."

"You're exaggerating. Are they really going to shock me? Haha, maybe it's cool, I still want to try it."

I am helpless, this child, why is he still so rude at this time. "You and I are just two poor people, let's see how I deal with you then."

Serena returned a smiling face, and then asked about yesterday's events: "Didn't you go to dinner with that muscular handsome guy yesterday? How was it?"

Since I stayed at my aunt's company all afternoon, the gym was deserted.So the muscular man called, and I said that I have been busy recently, and I really don’t have time. After hearing what I said, he encouraged me, saying that I should persist in exercising and so on.On Wednesday night, he said that he wanted to invite me to dinner. Didn't I say that I wanted to invite him last time?If he invites me instead, he probably won't refuse, right?Remembering that I did promise, I said I invite you, is it okay at 8 o'clock on Thursday night?He said it was so late to eat?I said I have something to do.He said okay, since I am treating guests, he will cooperate unconditionally.

Before talking about my muscle coach with Serena, Serena said that he is probably gay.I said you have never seen him, how can you be so sure?And they have girlfriends.Serena said that this was his reaction from G Da, this kind of fitness enthusiast, first of all, will not reject the body of the same sex.So I pestered him to explain to me what Gda is for a long time.So when I told him that he was going to treat the muscular man to dinner, I said that if you don't want me to go, I won't go.Unexpectedly, Serena said, why don't you go, just to verify whether G Da is accurate, if he hadn't been locked up, he would have come for such a fun thing.I'm embarrassed.

When I was eating, I kept looking at the muscular man unconsciously, and I quickly looked away when he sensed that I was watching.He must think I'm weird.But I really don't think he looks gay, but I don't think Serena is gay either... Well, I shouldn't have such stupid thoughts at all.

The muscular man asked me what the hell I was up to.I said that work and personal affairs are all piled up, and every day is full, so the gym may not be free for a while.The muscular man said that there was nothing he could do if he was so busy, and then said that even if he didn't go to the gym, he could use the environment to exercise, and he would use the reclining chair to demonstrate to me on the spot.Khan~ I hurriedly stopped him, it turned out that this person was quite nervous.

He asked me if I was busy with my girlfriend?I hesitated for a moment, smiled and said, no, I don't have a girlfriend.He was surprised and said, didn't you say you had a girlfriend before?He also said he was in good shape.I said it was to tease you, wouldn't it be embarrassing to say no.I thought at the time that it would be better not to tell such unnecessary lies.Unexpectedly, he immediately asked again: "Are you gay?"

I almost spit out a mouthful of food: "Ann?"

"I'm just curious."

"You're too direct." I don't know why, but I don't want to lie at all.In normal times, it is absolutely impossible for me to talk about this with people I don't know very well.But thinking about it, maybe even because of unfamiliarity, he can't touch my life, so I can confess. "Do I look alike?"

"No... Even if you think you shouldn't have a girlfriend, haha." He drank a glass of wine while talking, and then smirked.

In the past, when I just joined the company, I was still running business, and I was socializing with clients outside almost every day.At that time, my drinking capacity was not limited, and I never got drunk after drinking beer.It may be too infrequent to drink now, but after only a few beers, I fainted.The muscular man asked me again if I have a BF, am I busy with BF matters?Maybe it was because I was feeling uncomfortable and I just needed someone who could confide in me, so I actually said it honestly.When he heard the end, he patted my shoulder and drank heavily, looking more worried than me, and kept saying "Brother, it's not easy for you." Heh, in just a short while, I was promoted to brother.In fact, I should thank him. After talking this way, I feel less tired in my heart, and I should be able to persevere.

I was not as drunk as he thought, and I was clear in my mind, but my steps were a little disobedient, but the muscular man insisted on taking me home.I said just take me to the taxi.

He chose this restaurant in the pedestrian street, so he had to go to the street first.I didn't want him to help me, but as soon as he let go I fell down, and he had to help me again.Looking at his side face in the hazy neon, I thought for a moment, if only Serena was helping me now.The muscular man asked me why I was giggling, and I said nothing.Heh, he's not Serena, if Serena would take the opportunity to eat my tofu, and I would definitely take the opportunity to suppress him.

After sending me to the car, the muscular man encouraged me not to give up, and after Serena and I were together, he invited us to dinner.I said yes, Serena is very edible, you have to bring enough money.

Chatting with Muscle Man recharged my batteries, and his understanding and support made me more sure that I was right.Yes, there are people in the world who support us!I will not give up!I don't know if it's because I have the motivation again, when I went to my aunt's company this afternoon...