driftwood

Zhou Chen didn't know how long he had been lying on the bed in the hotel. He was still very hungry when it was dark last night, but now that the sun has dyed half of the sky red, he no longer feels it.

He sat up, got out of bed and took a step, his eyes were unsteady, and there was still a long-lasting darkness.He stood leaning on the wall for a long time, until the blackness dissipated and the double shadow disappeared, and then he staggered forward.

How did he become like this? His beard is unshaven, his eyes are scarlet, his hair has grown a lot, and he looks like a decadent young man.

When Zhou Chen was shaving, he thought that Chen Xing didn't know what he was doing, maybe he got up, and wondered if he didn't dream about himself last night, whether he was secretly crying these days, whether he was thinking about himself.

Whether he wants it or not, it has nothing to do with him.Chen Xing was still Chen Xing, but it was no longer his.

A piece of pure white foam was stained with a little red, which hurt a little.Zhou Chen bent down to wash off the foam with water, only to see the scratch on his chin that was seeping with blood. It was neither long nor short, nor deep nor shallow, but it just hurt.

While taking a shower, a mist rose up. Zhou Chen turned around and saw his back in the mirror. He turned his head away and looked away. He didn't know whether it was intentional or not. Anyway, he saw the teeth marks on his shoulders.

He didn't know that a person could have so many tears. He didn't know that tears could make such a loud noise when they fell down, and even splash water.He also just found out, and his heart ached, it was really terrible.

"Complaints are worthy, hand in hand.

Not being able to fly makes me perish. "

My fault, I am punished.

There are many snack bars below the hotel. Zhou Chen entered one at random. The proprietress asked him what he wanted to eat. He opened his mouth, but couldn’t speak. Ravioli on top.After eating a bowl of wontons, I didn't feel full, nor hungry.

After dinner, Zhou Chen bought two bouquets of chrysanthemums from a roadside flower shop, held them in his hands and walked up the road up the mountain. Occasionally, a few cars drove past him with the wind, and then, It is a long silence.

It was almost noon when we reached the cemetery on the mountainside. It was not Qingming, and there were not many people in the cemetery.Zhou Chen registered at the gate and entered the cemetery.

Zhou Chen stopped in front of a tombstone. There was a black and white photo on the tombstone. The man in the photo looked dignified and handsome, but he looked like he was in his 20s. His eyebrows were as gentle as Zhou Chen's.

Zhou Chen bent down to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the tombstone, lowered his eyes and quietly looked at the photo on the tombstone for a while, then squatted down with a tissue, wiped the photo carefully, took a few steps back, and stood next to the tombstone. in front of the tombstone.

"Brother, I'm here to see you." The flower quilt was placed in front of the tombstone, Zhou Chen looked down at the face on the tombstone that was very similar to himself, and he smiled: "Brother, I haven't had time to tell you that I have a boy." friend."

Zhou Chen smiled and burst into tears unpreparedly, "But brother, I broke up with him, I feel very sad, the kind of pain that is about to die."

"He loved me so much. After you left, no one loved me so much again."

"But brother, it would be great if I didn't love him that much. In this case, seeing him worry about me every day and shed tears for me, I wouldn't feel so uncomfortable. I just opened my eyes and closed my eyes and accepted it calmly." , but no, I can’t be selfish to him.”

The tears hanging on my face were dried by the wind, and my face hurt a little.Zhou Chen's eyes were red, and he stopped smiling. "Brother, I haven't seen you for a long time, why did I bring all the bad news."

"Your mother is ill, it's not serious, just a minor operation in a few days will be all right."

"Brother, don't worry too much, I will be fine."

"Brother, I'm leaving."

Chen Xing stayed in the hospital for one night and then went back to school. The next day he went to the library as usual to catch up on the experiment report and endorsement. There was nothing different. In the eyes of outsiders, Chen Xing was no different from usual, except that he didn’t smile much.

Chen Xing would send messages to Zhou Chen every day.

——Zhou Chen, I ate boiled pork slices at noon today, the temperature in Beijing has dropped, it's so cold.

——Accompany Wang Yizhe to buy clothes today, and I bought you a sweater.

——The weather is fine today, I miss you very much.

——Zhou Chen, it's already the fourth day, why don't you come to me?

The message was not rejected, but there was no reply either.Chen Xing fell asleep in a daze in the middle of the night, and would take out his mobile phone and send a message to Zhou Chen: "Your white sweater is very beautiful, put it on next time you see me."

The call from the hospital came in in the middle of the night. Zhou Chen fell asleep lying on the bed after returning from the cemetery. When the phone rang, he thought it was Chen Xing. When he saw the string of unknown numbers, he felt a little lost , but also relieved.

He sat on the bed and answered, the voice on the other side of the phone was a little anxious: "Hello, are you Yang Qiu's family?"

"Well, I am."

"Please come to the hospital as soon as possible. The patient has acute heart failure and is being rescued."

Zhou Chen sat on the bed in a daze for a long time, reaching out to press the bedside lamp, thinking about what the nurse said just now, he slowly got out of bed, brushed his teeth and washed his face, put on his shoes, took out his bank card, and went out.

Along the way, his mind was more sober and calm than ever. There were a few conspicuous red letters at the door of the operating room: "Operation", he went to a chair beside him and sat down, staring at the operating room in a daze.I don't know how long it took before the lights went out, and a doctor wearing a mask opened the door. Zhou Chen rubbed his numb leg and stood up. The doctor stood in front of him and sighed softly, "Sorry, we've tried our best. .”

The light above his head was dazzling, and Zhou Chen felt numb. He didn't realize that she was indeed dead until he lifted the cloth and saw Yang Qiu with her eyes tightly closed.However, this recognition didn't make him feel bad, it didn't make him cry, just like a sudden death of an irrelevant person, as far as he was concerned, he couldn't feel the pain of bereavement.He sat on the chair in the corridor for a long time, and when it was almost dawn, he called Yang Dong. Yang Dong started crying on the phone, and Zhou Chen waited for her to finish crying.

He contacted the crematorium, and after a few years, he stepped into the house where he grew up again. The passbook was placed in Yang Qiu's cabinet, and there were hundreds of thousands on the card, enough to buy a cemetery, but he didn't know the password .

Yang Dong held Yang Qiu's urn and cried at the entrance of the crematorium. Zhou Chen didn't shed a single tear. He turned his head and asked Yang Dong, "Auntie, do you know the password of her passbook?"

Yang Dong said intermittently: "Your mother mentioned it to me when she was in the hospital, it seems to be your brother's birthday."

Zhou Chen smiled inappropriately, how stupid, should have thought of it earlier.

Yang Qiu's cemetery couldn't be next to Zhou Chuan and his father. Zhou Chen still bought a cemetery for Yang Qiu in that cemetery. There was no funeral, and there were only a few bouquets of white chrysanthemums in front of the tombstone.

Zhou Chen bought a train ticket when he went back. After coming here for a month, the temperature dropped a lot. On the way to the train station, Zhou Chen went to the mall and bought a coat to wrap around his body. The train runs from [-]:[-] p.m. to [-]:[-] a.m. At this point, what Zhou Chen bought was a hard seat, a seat by the window.There were two girls sitting next to her, who looked like college students.I started eating melon seeds and potato chips as soon as I got in the car, and chatted while eating. The topics I talked about were just which boys in the school were more handsome, and which campus boys were of higher quality.

The sky gradually darkened, and the carriage gradually became quieter. Zhou Chen tilted his head to look out the window, and something suddenly fell on his shoulder. He turned his head and saw the girl next to him asleep, with her whole head resting on his shoulder.

Zhou Chen passed her to look at another girl, and the other girl suppressed a smile and said softly, "Handsome, let her lean on your shoulder, she's still single."

Zhou Chen pushed the girl's shoulder with his finger, smiled and said to the girl next to him, "Sorry, she is single, but I am not. Do you think she will lean on your shoulder or sleep on the floor?"

The girl waved her hand and moved a little to the side and said, "Oh, I eat and go to the toilet at the same time, it's inconvenient. Besides, it doesn't matter if she's not single and let her rely on it."

Zhou Chen stood up when he let go of his hand, and the girl's head hit the seat, but it didn't make much noise.It's just that she rubbed her head with tears in her eyes, and looked up at Zhou Chen. The girl next to her was stunned, and asked Zhou Chen in a low voice: "Are you crazy? What if she runs into something wrong?"

Zhou Chen sat down again, with a calm expression: "Does it have anything to do with me?"

The girl finally shed tears, and asked in a nasal voice: "Why are you like this, you just don't want to be relied on, why are you doing this?"

"Sorry, I'm married." Zhou Chen stretched out his hand, and there was a shining ring on his ring finger.He smiled and said: "My wife is small-minded, and I only let him rely on my shoulders. Also, he is very fierce and the kind who can beat people."

After Zhou Chen finished speaking, he continued to turn his head and look out of the window. In fact, it was so dark that he couldn't see anything.The two girls next to him were still talking in a low voice, and Zhou Chen touched the ring on his hand, turning it round and round.

Zhou Chen didn't close his eyes all night, so he just sat and arrived at the station. He came in with the suitcase, cleaned up the room, took a shower, and went to Uncle Wang's house to bring Ergou back.The curtains were drawn, and the light was blocked out of the window. Zhou Chen sat cross-legged on the sofa with the cat in his arms, lowered his head and touched Ergou's back and said softly, "I don't have a mother anymore, and I don't have Chen Xing anymore."

The cat stretched out its pink tongue and licked the back of Zhou Chen's hand again and again. The tongue was rough, and the back of his hand was itchy.Zhou Chen raised the second dog to his face and asked, "Chen Xing, it's your second father, do you understand? I left him behind, do you understand?"

Ergou kicked his legs and struggled to run, Zhou Chen pressed his neck and held him tightly in his arms, whispering to himself, "Ergou, Dad wants to get your second dad back, but Dad isn't good enough."

"Go with Dad, don't stay here anymore, let's go find him."

The cat meowed a few times in his arms, and then became quiet. Zhou Chen reached out and took the phone. He didn't read WeChat all the time, and there were a lot of messages.He clicked on the dialog box, and there were many messages from Chen Xing, nagging, just like they were together before.

Zhou Chen looked at the phone and smiled, Chen Xing missed him, Chen Xing Beijing had cooled down, Chen Xing caught a cold again, someone chased Chen Xing, Chen Xing said there were both boys and girls, Chen Xing asked him when he would go back to find him.

I set it on fire and watched it spread.I know it's home, and I know that I can't go back.

The author has something to say: Everyone!don't want!Worry!Absolutely absolute HE, I also feel very uncomfortable when I write about abuse. I was walking on the road at noon this afternoon and thought of Zhou Chen and Chen Xing, and tears came down my eyes, but the story is there and cannot be changed by force...