[Comprehensive Manga] Ann

PART1

noisy.

Noisy.

boring.

If living is to breathe the foul-smelling air in such a boring world, what is the point?

The whole world seems to be gloomy. Looking at the people coming and going on the street, wearing all kinds of hypocritical masks, pretending to live happily, I don't understand why human beings are so happy with this false disguise.

Walking alone on the street, listening to the louder and louder heavy metal music in my ears, I want to cover all the disgusting voices like this, even my own voice is not wanted to be heard.

I can't see anything with color in my eyes, I am alone in the whole world, I can't hear other people's voices, and I don't want to care about that boring creature of "other people".It seems that there is no one in the emptiness, only a large area of ​​gray swallows everything, yes, everything.

This kind of world—it would be better if everything disappeared.

"Look at that person coming to buy tickets again. Do you think he comes to this park every day just to take a nap?"

"It doesn't look like a rich man, and he never speaks. It must be something wrong with his brain."

"Maybe he's an art student, don't you think he's very artistic?"

"Okay, stop talking, he's here."

Looking at a group of women who were whispering, but with a smile on their face, I don't know what those boring creatures are talking about, but it probably has something to do with me.

When I got the ticket, I saw one of the women smiling and saying something to me, but I didn't hear it, I just felt that the woman's smile looked annoying.The jokes and explorations in those women's eyes just make people feel boring, and they don't understand what these people want to explore in themselves, or what they can find to make them feel satisfied.

The reason why I bought a ticket to enter the park is because there are few people.

Since it is impossible to find a world without people, it can only reluctantly stay here.Following the previous route, we came to a corner of the uninhabited park, a large area of ​​green lawn, a few big trees with a long history, some dazzling sunlight penetrated through the gaps in the green leaves, leaving mottled shadows on the lawn, But it's only late summer, and the leaves with withered yellow have already fallen with the wind.

Although he had no intention of admiring this quiet scenery, it was undeniable that this was the place where he felt most comfortable.

Lying lazily in the shade of a tree, closing your eyes, your ears are still filled with noisy and messy heavy metal music, the kind of music that makes your eardrums rupture and your internal organs vibrate, only at this time can you really feel your own existence.

Yes, there is, it turns out that he is still alive.

As time passed, the music in my ear made me feel that my body and mind became numb and cold, but the dazzling sunlight gradually shone on my face, and the scorching heat made me feel a little uncomfortable.

Opening his eyes, he saw—

Sitting on a branch, looking at his boy.

The boy was wearing the simplest white clothes. He was sitting on the branch like that, as if he had no weight. His body didn't seem to block the sunlight, but the clear sunlight was shining through. The whole boy's body seemed to be Exudes a faint light.

Light golden soft short hair, glowing orange and warm under the sunlight, fair skin somewhat transparent, some pointed ears, and the most striking thing is the pair of blue eyes on the delicate face .As if it embraced the entire blue sky, it was full of waves, and there seemed to be some curiosity or other simpler emotions in those pure blue pupils.

It seems to be the first time to see such pure and beautiful colors...

However, under the sun's rays, the burning eyes seemed to be shedding tears in pain. He closed his eyes uncomfortablely, and when he opened them again, he couldn't see anyone. Everything was like a beautiful illusion.

Perhaps because of the influence of the sun, there are still colorful halos flashing in the field of vision, but it seems that I can naturally piece together the picture just now in my mind. Everything seems to be bright and lively at that moment, and the whole world seems to suddenly With color, but it also quickly began to slowly dim and quiet down.

"Is that—an elf?"

PART2

I really want to see such pure and beautiful colors...

Especially those pair of blue pupils seemed to contain the entire color of the sky, and all the beautiful and bright colors seemed to be perfectly integrated into those eyes, which was a color he had never seen before.

Suddenly there was an emotion in his heart that he hadn't felt for a long time, as if after a long period of silence, there was finally a ripple in his heart. Yes, he longed to see that scene again.

He actually possessed the mood of longing, eager to see that boy again, or rather, the elf.I don't know why I care so much, maybe my soul, which has been soaked in darkness and filth, has finally been inspired by the despicable nature of human beings, and I also yearn for such pure and beautiful things.

A day later, he came here as usual, but his mood seemed to have changed since yesterday.Obviously the whole world has not changed, it is still so boring and noisy, but the pure blue seems to be engraved in the mind and cannot be faded away.

He tried, lay on the lawn, tried, pretended to be asleep, tried, listened to music, tried, opened his eyes...

Then, he saw nothing but a blinding glare.

lost...

This should be the emotion that I am hiding in my heart now.

What a pathetic human being. Even if I am like this, would I believe in such nonsense fairy tales?

This world, this world is nothing but a petri dish of delusion and selfishness, and such childish and pitiful fantasies may only be the only remaining desires as a test subject in a petri dish.

How could creatures like elves appear in this depraved and noisy world.Such a beautiful and pure elf should live in a fairy tale, and should not be polluted by such a dirty world.

Even if it really exists - it shouldn't appear in front of me.

PART3

"Well, Akana-senpai, can you, can you accept this letter?"

The days passed by day by day, and it seemed that there was no change at all, except for occasional accidents.For example, now, suddenly a woman called her senior blocked her way. Seeing the woman in front of her blushing, with excitement and nervousness in her eyes, she handed the colored envelope in front of her, but stuck it on the envelope. The special love stickers on it can also clearly understand this woman's little girl's thoughts.

In my memory, I have never had the impression of this woman, or in other words, I don't remember a few people at all, and I don't understand why this woman's ridiculous "like" feelings for me come from.

The sight of the onlookers that suddenly surged around made me feel like a clown being watched. More and more people surrounded me, booing noisily, as if they were trying to express their bored mood.

If, if I am not in this world, can I finally get rid of these noisy voices, can I live alone quietly, can I not be bound by any constraints that belong to this world?

Thinking about it this way, it seems that leaving this world like this is a very good choice.

"Akana... I, I have liked you for a long time. I know you don't like to talk very much, but I know that Akina has always been lonely for you. I, can I be by your side?"

"It's noisy."

When he said these words flatly, the expression of the woman who was still smiling shyly became a little stiff, and the hand holding the envelope gradually lowered, and she looked at herself with a little hurt.

I can't understand the thinking of these women. It is obvious that she disturbed me, but it seems that I have done something wrong.Moreover, he said those words so self-righteously, as if he knew himself very well, and also felt pity along the way.However, in fact, these people are just thinking self-righteously, pretending to understand everything, but in fact they can't understand anything.

He took the love letter from the unknown woman, tore a few pieces casually, threw them on the ground, and left without hesitation.Put on the earphones, use heavy metal music to swallow up all the subsequent noisy sounds, and don't want to hear any other people's voices, I just want to live by myself like this.

The kind of boring thing called "like" that doesn't mean anything at all

— Not to mention for a hopeless human being like me.

PART4

In the jewelry store, I saw a plush doll of a kitten.

For the first time, I stopped at the door of this kind of small shop that girls love, not because the kitten reminded me of the pet that died at home, but the kitten's eyes were blue.

The eyes of this kind of crude doll cannot be compared with the blue pupils of the elves seen in the hallucinations no matter what.

It's just that when I saw it, those light blue eyes naturally awakened my memory, and made me remember the scene of that day again.

I was a little puzzled why I bought a kitten doll, but I bought it if I bought it.

It felt soft to the touch, and the kitten's blue eyes were wide open, but it was obviously lifeless. How did he see the elf from these eyes?

He didn't want to understand the answer.

In other words, even if you want to understand it, it doesn't make much sense.

When I came to that corner of the park again as usual, instead of sleeping on the grass, I climbed up the tree and sat where the elf he had seen before was sitting.

Seemed to be caught in wishful thinking, wondering, if the elf had ever been here, what did he see sitting here?And - in the eyes of the elves, what is he like?

He couldn't figure it out, the music in his ears was too loud, so loud that he couldn't recall his appearance at all, but he could clearly recall his silhouette projected in those blue pupils that day.

I really want to watch it again...

It seems that I heard my own inner voice, which is particularly obvious in the chaotic heavy metal music, and it seems to be constantly playing back in my hollowed out mind.

It turns out that he can also be so persistent - yes, people will always become a little paranoid in the end.

Looking at the kitten recording doll in his hand, if the eyes of this puppet can reflect, he must be able to see his silly expression.He reached out and pressed the switch on the kitten's right hand, revealing his own voice:

"I want to see you……"

When he pressed the switch again, he felt that he was really stupid. He actually did these ridiculous things for an unwarranted fantasy.When he heard his own low and hoarse voice from that crude doll, the man really laughed at himself.

What the hell is he?Does the most superficial stupidity of human beings finally burst out at the end?In other words, he finally began to become weak.

Finally, the silver-haired man left and threw the doll casually in the trash can.

Maybe if he turned around at this time, he could really see the blond elf with blue eyes standing under the big tree and watching his back.

PART5

"Are you looking for me?"

The blond boy was sitting on a high branch, looking down slightly at someone.

The young man's light golden hair seemed to be messy with a light golden glow, and the young man's almost transparent skin seemed to have a soft radiance, and his ears were somewhat pointed.Those blue pupils seemed to be the most transparent and beautiful sapphire, without any impurities, and that purity had a kind of magical power that made people's heart flutter.

The wind picked up, the boy's clothes and blond hair shook slightly, the breeze was accompanied by falling leaves, but at this moment it seemed to be still.

In this moment, it seems that someone saw eternity, or hoped that this moment could become eternity.

The silver-haired man stood under the tree, looking up at the boy, or elf.The man's green eyes still seemed like stagnant water, but maybe only the man knew what he was really thinking.

He didn't hear the elf's voice. The heavy metal music from the earphones covered all the sound. The man paused, as if he wanted to reach out and take off the earphones, but he just raised his hand and then put it down, nothing happened. special move.

Instead, the elf sitting on the tree tilted his head slightly, looking at the man with a seductive look in his eyes.It seems that they don't quite understand why the human beings who said they want to see themselves, after another day, suddenly become - as if they don't want to see themselves.

The boy jumped down from the tree, rather than jumping, it would be better to say he flew down lightly.The boy walked towards the silver-haired man, stretched out his hand and took off the man's earphones, and then put the earphones on one side towards his pointed ears with a strange look.

"Humans, do you like to hear this?"

After hearing the frenzied heavy metal music in the earphones, the boy frowned and moved the earphones away from his right ear. Then the boy's blue pupils were filled with doubts, which seemed incomprehensible.

The silver-haired man stood where he was, didn't speak, but just watched.

Finally saw, do elves really exist?

Suddenly, childhood cognition emerged from the bottom of his heart. He who once lay in his mother's arms seemed to be fascinated by elf stories.After staying away from the noisy music and finally hearing the soft voice of the elf in this quiet world, the whole world seemed silent and clear.

He didn't know how to react, or any reaction would make him feel that such a dirty self would tarnish the beautiful scene at this time.

In a trance, the elf gently covered his ears with his hands, and his cold expression was reflected in those blue pupils, but he saw the warmest smile in those blue pupils, as if Carrying the purest beauty.Then the elf's eyes closed slowly, the corners of his mouth were still slightly curved, and the young man's voice seemed to dispel all the turbidity and gloom like the most beautiful singing, leaving only the most ethereal clarity.

"Did you hear it?"

"The sound of leaves falling in the wind, touching the soil..."

"The sound of lilacs blooming quietly in the sun..."

"The sound of dewdrops falling slowly on the green grass..."

"Sunshine pouring on the land, warm and soft sounds..."

"That's—life."

The man's green pupils trembled slightly. Looking at the elf with his eyes closed, he felt the touch in his ears, and felt that all his senses were magnified. He seemed to have really heard the silent voices that the elf said.

He seems to have come to another world, there is no darkness, no clutter, only transparent silence, and the sound of life.

life?

At this moment, he couldn't help hesitating a little, his definition of a humble life seemed to start to waver at this moment.However, those pure and beautiful lives only exist in the elf world in front of me.

The elf slowly opened his eyes, the clearest light was in those blue water eyes, the corners of the boy's mouth were slightly raised, with a gentle and brilliant arc, but under the sunlight, it seemed that it would disappear immediately Not the same.

The young man put down his hands covering the man's ears, then reached out on tiptoe and picked up a fallen leaf from the man's head, and put it in the palm of his hand.

The fallen leaves in the palm of the hand were withered and turned yellow, but after a while, the leaves gradually turned green, which seemed to be the color of the greenest leaves in midsummer.

On the leaves, light red characters appeared, but they couldn't understand them. Maybe they were elves' unique characters.

"That's my name—Ann."

PART6

"Akana, what's the outside world like?"

The elf sitting next to him was weaving a wreath with great interest, and then, as if he suddenly thought of something, he looked at him curiously with those blue eyes.

"Would you like to go out?"

I didn't answer, probably because I didn't know how to answer.The outside world is boring, noisy, and meaningless to me, but as a human being, I have to be bound by the necessary role.Even though he asked like this, he didn't want An to walk out of this place and into that human world.

"Do not want to."

When I thought the elf would say no to me, he said he didn't want to, and was still happily weaving the wreath.

"Of course I don't want to go to places that Akana hates."

Ann raised her head, with a familiar bright smile on her face, and then put the garland in her hands on my head. I stared blankly at Ann's smile, and then laughed involuntarily, thinking that There was a warmth and joy in my heart that I had never felt for a long time.

However, perhaps only elves would say such a thing.

Without the bondage and entanglement of any world, as elves, they can live freely in nature forever, like what they like, and stay away from what they hate, without any worries and troubles.

And he, as a human being, cannot stay here forever just because he likes this place.

Impossible too—when it comes to the word "forever," even the word "future" doesn't feel like it belongs to him.

"Ann, you will forget me."

The answer must be yes, in the long years of the elves, he is just a small episode, but in their eternity, what is such a small present?

He is the eternal insignificance of the elves, and An is indeed the eternity in his insignificance. Such a conclusion makes him a little depressed.However, he was also a little rejoicing in his heart, at least, he still met Ann.

An didn't speak, but just looked at herself quietly, those transparent blue eyes seemed to penetrate her rotten heart.In fact, he was so despicably waiting for An to say, "Absolutely not".He thought so selfishly that An would definitely say so, and if An said so, it meant that he would never forget himself.

However, Ann just looked at himself and fell silent.

"Maybe." In the end, Ann replied, with a slight smile, as if she didn't care much about the answer, "But, even if I forget China, China must live well."

Do you want to live well?

——This is really Akana's biggest joke.

PART7

When I got home one day, I found the door of the house was opened.

Walking into the house without any surprise, I saw the human named "Father" standing in the living room.

That vicissitudes of life man has aged rapidly in the past few years, the wrinkles on his face have made it difficult to see the man's handsome appearance when he was young, and those cloudy eyes looked at him with various emotions of helplessness and pity.

I hate looking at the eyes of this man, the eyes full of fatherly love. When he has long forgotten that he once had a character with the ridiculous term "father", this man suddenly appeared in front of him, as if he was about to be devastated It's the same as mourning his past mistakes.

"Red Name..."

The old man's voice was hoarse with a little trembling, and his cloudy eyes were pleading and tired.

"Father doesn't want you to forgive me. You can continue to hate me, but please, can you go for the operation? As long as you have the operation, I can agree to any request."

"Then please jump out of the window right now."

That deep voice was as piercing as fingernails scratching the blackboard. He didn't want to hear this man's voice again, nor did he want to see this man again.If it's hatred, it doesn't count. He is so tired of this world that he feels that hatred is a powerless waste of emotion.

The old man just froze, and then looked at himself with more pity, and there was no scene of jumping off the building that I wanted to see.

Yeah, that's what I want to see.

How many times have I fantasized in my mind that this man, like my own mother, can jump from the window of this floor in front of me, and then my brains are splashed on the ground, and the bright red blood is like the cheapest red watercolor. On the dark concrete floor, and the man's body may still be twitching on the ground or his eyes are bulging, trying to look at something.

"China, you're still young... how could you just wait to die so easily!"

"If you stay here any longer, I'll jump off."

Looking at the excited tone of the old man, I don't understand why this man suddenly remembered my "son" who had been abandoned for many centuries.The unreasonable and disgusting noise made me feel a little annoyed. I walked to the window sill and opened the window. Some hot wind was blowing on my face, but I felt that I vaguely remembered something very important.

Maybe it's really because of something interesting like the bond between father and son.

Just like I know that "father" can't jump off a building in order to let me have an operation;

"Father" also knew that I would really jump off the building because he continued to stay here.

The meaning of life, no one knows.

There are always some people who like to talk about their dreams in a high-sounding manner and realize the value of life.

Maybe, they really got something in the end, maybe, they pretended to get something in the end.

However, for me

——Maybe, in the end, no, the next death is the best ending.