Supernatural powers are intellectual and handicapped, how do I survive

Before the story of the five declines of heaven and man really started, the lives of the two directors in the root world can only be described as ordinary daily life.

Compared with Fyodor, who is obsessed with opening a coffee shop, Shuji Tsushima, who is obviously still engraved with the word "troubleshooting" in his genes, is more able to find fun in such an ordinary life.

Today's victim is a certain Mr. Devil.

The values ​​of the milk cat transformed by the mimicry function are exactly the same as those of the administrator under normal conditions.The body looks petite, but with a cat punch, it can still easily knock down ordinary people.

After hanging out with his boyfriend in the master bedroom, Tsujima Shuji, who has turned back into a milk cat, walked softly, humming, and came to the study room that exudes a glimmer of light.The black cat stepped onto the computer chair and came to the desk. Relying on its cute face, it squeezed the mouse off the desk in a desperate manner.

It is not easy for the mouse to get that thing up again.

The devil, who could only tap the keyboard with his claws, was watched by a black coal ball.However, his movements did not slow down in any way, and he still stared intently at the computer screen, continuing to sort out information that was not considered confidential.

After all, this place is Pandora's Actor's territory, even if he has processed the computer, he can't return to the usual state, and many files related to the content of the later plan dare not be stored here.

In this way, it doesn't matter how much the black cat messes up, as long as he doesn't kick off his computer cable, everything is fine.

So in the next second, Shuji Tsushima, who had turned into a black cat, thumped and bit the power cord of the computer.

Accompanied by a scream of the milk cat, the bright blue computer screen suddenly lost its light.The power tripped, and the dazzling fire flashed past.The milk cat's whiskers were so shocked that it curled, and there were bursts of blue smoke from the top of its head, and its consciousness was extremely confused.

It wailed, made a very wronged sound, covered with a burnt body, staggered and fell into the big mouse's arms.

The big mouse, whose front paws were deadlocked in mid-air and had not been able to press the save button for a long time, fell into a long silence.

How should he react in this situation...

Shuji Tsushima, who was electrocuted without warning, slowly straightened up after a short rest and shook his neck.

He restored his appearance to the normal mode of a milk cat, his green eyes glowing in the dark fixedly fixed on the mouse beside him.

At the next moment when Fyodor felt bad, the milk cat rushed out and grabbed the nape of the mouse several times its size in one bite.Using the strength value of the administrator, Shuji Tsushima successfully dragged the big mouse with smooth fur from the computer chair.

A certain Mr. Demon, who was completely unable to resist, did not make any embarrassing noises.He could only put on an expression of lovelessness, was dragged by the milk cat all the way, and took the elevator to leave the apartment openly.

He now only hopes that one month will pass as soon as possible.

──

For Osamu Dazai, laziness is the normal state as long as it does not involve matters that really require him to be serious.

Arriving late and leaving early is a daily routine, and it is even more common to pass on one's paperwork skills to Kunikida.Taking advantage of the gap between field trips, finding a suitable river will also jump down. When there is no important event, you may even skip work and lie in bed for a whole day.

It should have been the same today.

The bleary-eyed young man didn't set the alarm at all, until the glare of the sun fell on his face through the window, which really affected the quality of sleep, and then he opened his eyes amidst the strange knocking sound of glass.

Osamu Dazai yawned, rubbed his messy curly hair, and turned his head away with an impatient expression on his face.

The moment he saw the scene outside the window, all the drowsiness left him in an instant.The young man blinked blankly, and after confirming again and again that what he saw was not false, he got out of bed and slowly pushed open the old glass window.

Osamu Dazai grabbed the gray unknown creature by the back of its neck, brought it to his eyes, and murmured, "What is this?"

The future self who was supposed to leave last night held the big ball of fur in his mouth, stuck to the outer eaves of the window, and stared at the room with burning eyes.

It wasn't until Osamu Dazai picked up a creature with a tail that was at least 30 centimeters long that he completely confirmed the other party's species.

It was a mouse so big that cats would tremble at the sight of it.

"Meow~" The black milk cat tilted its head, echoing in a coquettish voice.

"Beaver? No, there are no webbed feet. Is this the big rat that was exposed to the radiation from Chernobyl?"

It was confirmed that the fur of this unpopular species in his hand was clean and shiny, obviously someone raised it carefully, and the bald tail did not have any scars.Only then did the curly-haired youth feel relieved, grabbed its tail, and let the extremely well-behaved mouse hang upside down in the air.

"..."

The mouse quietly didn't say a word, and let the other party mess around.Only when the young man's fingers were swollen somewhere near the base of the tail did he struggle violently and make a harsh "squeak" sound at the same time.

"Meow~" The milk cat who watched this scene meowed again.

I don't know if it was Osamu Dazai's illusion, but he vaguely felt that the sound of this three-month-old little furball was gloating.

Could it be that this mouse is...

"As expected...that is to say, that Melos' Pandora's Actor is you."

Putting aside the unrealistic thoughts in his mind for the time being, recalling the information he got from Sigma two days ago, Dazai Osamu's expression became extremely exciting, "Ha, what kind of international joke is this?"

"Sigma" is my child in the future, but he who appeared in the detective agency two days ago was pretending to be his future partner.He spoke convincingly, and determined that the black cat was abandoned by Pandora's Actor, and the culprit that caused it to fall out of favor was a nuclear radiation giant rat from Chernobyl.

This kind of seemingly chaotic information only needs a little speculation to find out the truth behind it.

After all, the history of Melles' wealth is too nonsense, but it has also become the talk of many people after dinner. Just a simple search on the Internet, you can know what kind of company Melles was originally.

──A world-famous canned crab meat producer.

This kind of thing is indeed a choice that I will make.

"Mia~"

Shuji Tsushima, who looked like a black cat, flicked his tail and jumped into Osamu Dazai's dormitory, circling back and forth as if he was inspecting his own territory.He finally stopped in front of the closet, with his furry cat paws resting on the gap, and easily pushed the papered wall door open, revealing the empty interior that smelled of mildew.

As if guessing some possibility, Osamu Dazai let go of his hand in disgust, and let the ten-jin rat fall freely to the ground.

He pointed to the motionless mouse lying on the ground with his toe, and said in a bad tone, "Why did you bring this mouse here? Let me explain in advance that I am very poor and have nothing to feed him."

No matter whether this creature is what he thinks or not, Osamu Dazai doesn't like this kind of creature that likes to live in dark corners.

Not to mention that it is easy to make him think of a certain Russian who is keen to make trouble.The canned crab meat that he managed to hoard was persecuted by rats a while ago, and all of them were gnawed until they leaked big holes. This alone is enough reason for him to hate rats.

He wouldn't raise such a disgusting thing.

The atmosphere in the dormitory was very delicate. After pushing open the cabinet door, Shuji Tsushima, who looked like a black cat, came to the side of the listless mouse, combing his hair affectionately.

Dazai Osamu, who was forced to watch the cat and mouse family, only felt that his face was very good-looking.

This old-style apartment building has a long history, and the sound insulation effect is not good. There is a scrap car parked in the open space in front of the door all the year round, and no one cares about it.After all the valuable parts have been picked up by scavengers, there is only an empty shell left, and its fate is only to rust and rot in the wind and sun.

There was a faint sound of brakes on the road in front of the door. After the engine was turned off, the old wooden stairs leading to the dormitory on the second floor made an overwhelmed sound.

This house was rented as a dormitory for members of the Armed Detective Agency, and no outsiders would visit it on weekdays.Some may be criminals who have a grudge against the detective agency, or the postman who delivers the goods to the door...

The visitor stopped in front of Dazai Osamu's dormitory door, and after a short pause, there was a knock on the door.

"Mr. Dazai, there is your courier, please sign for it."

"Express delivery?" Osamu Dazai repeated with a blank expression, "I didn't buy anything..."

Of course, the main reason is that he has no money to buy.

After the door was opened, apart from a few delivery staff who were sweating profusely, there were countless cardboard boxes piled up all over the corridor, all of which were painted with king crab patterns.

Osamu Dazai, who knows a lot about canned crab meat, quickly understood what these logos represent. It is the most famous canned crab meat under Melles.It has been improved for many years in terms of material selection and seasoning. It is the highest quality product among similar products on the market, and it is also expensive.

After buying bandages, his monthly salary was spent on buying a dozen cans of this stuff, and there was nothing left.

These dozens of boxes of canned crab meat, even if he takes this as a staple food every day, are enough for him to eat for three months.

No wonder your future self checks to see if there is room in your closet, which can be filled to the brim if you get rid of the extra cardboard boxes.

The eyes of Osamu Dazai, who signed for the receipt with his seal, kept shining with the name of joy. He has no resistance to the heavy workload of moving dozens of boxes of canned food into the house. He has always been lazy.

The young man kept busy, muttering, "Wow, there are so many—all of them are canned crab meat!"

"Miwu..." The black cat lying on the back of the mouse blinked leisurely.

After finally moving all the boxes into the house, Osamu Dazai wiped his face with sweat dripping from his brow.Seeing that the house was so chaotic that there was nowhere to go, he simply sat down on the cardboard box full of cans, crossed his legs, and stared at the cat and mouse squeezed into the corner with a serious expression.

"What are you, bribery? Let me tell you first, I'm not so easy to give in."

"Meow!" the black cat retorted loudly.

In its mouth was a black gold card that was pulled out from nowhere. The low-key and luxurious card was printed with gilt cursive letters Mellors and some very small phrases on the magnetic strip.In addition, there are no redundant words, which look like deliberately created works of art.

Osamu Dazai, who took the black card, played with it in his hand, and finally he could barely make out the small characters in the sunlight, "What is this, the unlimited consumption card under Meles... hiss──"

With this thing, he went from being heavily in debt to a billionaire in an instant.

Now that it has been confirmed that the real identity of Osamu Dazai here is Pandora's Actor, it is shameless to say that many properties of Melles can be counted as his own.

Real estate, sports cars, luxury goods, and a series of things that ordinary people dare not even imagine, as long as they have this card personally sent by the leader of Melas, they can all be included in their pockets.

The problem is that Osamu Dazai has no pursuit of material conditions. The attraction of this card to him is nothing more than that he can get unlimited canned crab meat in the future.

The young man pretended to be flattered on the surface, but he was very sleepy, and this emotion immediately turned into panic.With full acting skills, he moved back tremblingly, covered his chest with his hands, and said tremblingly, "Could it be that it's a nurturing?!"

"To be precise, it's compensation." The black cat lightly bit the ear of the big mouse under it, and then gracefully jumped off the opponent, transforming back to its original form in an instant.

"Good afternoon, Xiaozhi~"

According to the content of the script, Shuji Tsushima, whose identity has been completely exposed, no longer hides his usual attire, and frankly reveals the dark yellow military uniform that was the Nazi style in front of his past self.

Osamu Dazai managed to choke on the other party's sudden appellation, and struggled to find his own voice after a long while, "...what a disgusting name that is."

No one has ever deliberately called him by his first name, especially the pet name with "Jiang" at the end, it will only make people feel chills down the spine.

"Nickname, pet name, because Xiaozhi is so cute, I can't bear it~" Shuji Tsushima held his face, and in the next second, he picked up Mr. Majin at his feet and handed it to Osamu Dazai. "To trouble you today, let's play with this equally cute Mr. Mouse."

"Playing? I don't like creatures like mice." The curly-haired young man with a displeased expression stiffened his face, and after his eyes met the mouse, he moved away completely.

devil...

Shuji Tsushima, who was wearing a black military cap, tilted his head, pretending to be stupid, and said, "What do you mean?"

"Don't ask knowingly."

"But as a pet, isn't a white-washed mouse very cute? Such a big one can still warm the bed in winter." It seems that because his favorite "pet" has been rejected, the young man in military uniform showed a crying expression. , rubbing his cheek against the mouse's soft belly, trying to justify the other's name.

"And the mouse is very good at hoarding food. If you live with him, you don't have to worry about not being able to eat."

Osamu Dazai sneered with a cold expression, and said in a bad tone, "It is clearly a pet, but it is completely regarded as a cohabitant suitable for living, but I am not a mouse, so give up."

He couldn't imagine that his future self would be crazy about being a matchmaker, trying to draw a red line between himself and the mouse from Russia.

What a joke.

"Well... mice and cats can get along very well together. After all, domesticated domestic cats are no longer wild, and their mouths are so sticky, so they have no interest in eating raw mice." Shuji Tsushima pinched his arms The mouse has a slender tail, and its mouth is pouted, "But it is possible to play with its long tail."

Osamu Dazai took a deep breath, his iris-colored eyes lost their luster, leaving a creepy darkness.

His voice was stiff, but there was a faint hint of anger, "I know what you want to say, stop joking."

He didn't believe that the devil would give up his long-cherished wish so easily. That person was very similar to him, but he was also much more insane than him. He was a logical and calm madman.

How could such a person who is only worthy of struggling in the cold quagmire give up everything and come to the sun voluntarily?

What's more, it is already clear who the phrase "domesticated domestic cat" refers to.

The "Osamu Dazai" in front of him is a bastard who betrayed Odasaku's last wish, returned to darkness, and worked hand in hand with that devil.

Shuji Tsushima smiled without warning at this moment.

"Some things, if you don't try, how will you know."

"!!!"

He stretched out his hand, trying to control Osamu Dazai easily by following Oda Saku's skill.The vigilant young man had no time to dodge, but Shuji Tsushima, who was wearing a military uniform, grabbed his wrist tightly.

In the next second, a very familiar black cat appeared in his hand, was grabbed by its front paws, and struggled in mid-air.

The clothes that Osamu Dazai had been wearing for an unknown amount of time fell slowly together with the profuse bandages and piled up on the ground.

"Wow, so I was wearing black briefs at this time, and my taste is not much different from what I have now." The young man in military uniform murmured to himself, holding a milk cat in one hand and flipping through his clothes in the other.

He took out a space capsule cat bag from the roulette wheel on his left arm, and signaled the big mouse to go in with his eyes.After the other party obeyed obediently, he stuffed the struggling milk cat together and zipped the side door.

"Hmph~ There's no problem like this. It's a little small inside, please squeeze it a little bit."

"Meow──!!"

Osamu Dazai, who was modified by the administrator to change the player's value and turned into a milk cat, was deeply affected by the instinct of this body.Even though the whole cat was forced to huddle in the furry embrace of the big mouse, the fur all over its body exploded uncontrollably, and it let out an incomparably sharp scream.

"Is it because the size difference is too big? This instinctive reaction is really bad." The young man in military uniform brought the cat bag to his eyes, and looked inside through the transparent window in the middle of the backpack.

"..."

The big mouse, which was squeezed so hard that it couldn't even turn around, stretched out its two front paws, and held down the trembling black cat on its belly, trying to stop the opponent's struggle.

After all, it hurts to be scratched by a cat.

"Don't worry Xiaozhi, this is just an ordinary big mouse with a very gentle personality, not the one you think." Shuji Tsushima laughed too unscrupulously, and ran the train with his mouth full.

"I think, Fyodor at this time should be planning how to destroy Yokohama."

"..." The mouse remained silent.

In fact, after Fyodor confirmed that what Pandora's Actor said last night was not a lie, he did have some subtle thoughts.

Since the "book" has a human form, the only "book page" left in the world is probably the one kept by the Supernatural Secret Service Section, and this "book" needs to be stolen by Pandora herself according to the plan.

Let the "book" steal the "book", even if it is a joke, it is too cold.

That being the case, why not try to follow what the other party said, and treat yourself, the so-called fiancée, a little...

gross.

When Fyodor was deep in thought, Shuji Tsushima tapped on the window of the backpack lightly, smilingly comforting the shivering milk cat that was completely caged by the breath of a big mouse and driven by instinct.

"You will have a hard time ahead, so take advantage of the last calm time before the storm and take a good rest."

Osamu Dazai, whose mind was extremely chaotic, was affected by the fear of this body, and could not listen to any words of the other party at all.

[To be eaten] This feeling kept attacking him, the black cat's heartbeat gradually accelerated, and it let out a weak whine uncontrollably.

Shuji Tsushima, who was also aware of this, sighed. He fumbled around in the roulette, and successfully found a book that was not too thick, and placed it in front of Osamu Dazai through the breathable mesh of the backpack.

It was a novel with a lake-blue cover, and in the center of the screen was a red-haired man in a bathrobe soaked by rain.The man raised his head, revealing his unshaven face, revealing a hint of decadence.On his shoulder lay a three-colored cat that was also soaked, stretched out its paws and grabbed the man's clothes tightly, and stared forward with round eyes.

"Seamless Clothes", by Sakunosuke Oda.

Shuji Tsushima, who took out the treasured treasure, shook the novel in his hand, "If you can get along well with it, I can definitely give you this book."

"mum……?

The milk cat finally stopped trembling, its kite-colored eyes fixed on the novel in the young man's hands through the grid.

He is very familiar with the man on the cover, Odasaku who died four years ago.However, he didn't have the slightest impression of this picture, and he didn't know when the other party took it.

Oda work...

Then it can only be the future that "Osamu Dazai" talked about, a novel written by Oda Sakunosuke, something he never had the chance to see.

"Mi woo──"

The milk cat began to struggle again. It stretched out its claws, frantically digging at the inside of the cat bag, wishing to escape from this space immediately and touch the book in the opponent's hand.

"That's right, since you are Osamu Dazai, you should know what this book is. And I will never make false deals."

Shuji Tsushima didn't care about the milk cat's watery eyes at all, and he didn't care how aggrieved and pitiful the other party's cry was.He put the novel back into his roulette, turned his back, raised his arms and snapped his fingers.

The activation of mimicry ability.

The camel trench coat immediately replaced his military uniform, which was exactly the same as Osamu Dazai's usual attire.

In order to make his casual clothes more perfect, Shuji Tsushima picked up the bolo bow tie from the pile of clothes at his feet, replaced the one under the collar, and then straightened his fluffy hairstyle very badly.

He put the cat bag on his back, opened a box of canned food, fished out a few boxes of canned crab meat and stuffed them into his jacket pocket, as if he was planning to use them as today's rations.

With a smirk on his face, the young man turned his backpack on purpose, so that Osamu Dazai, who was forced to become a milk cat, was crushed by the big rat until he whimpered, and then left the staff dormitory unhurriedly.

"Then from today, I will be Osamu Dazai."