What happened in the summer of 2020

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I lay on the balcony railing to blow the air.

Thinking about the phone call with Cang Hai just now.

Thinking about it, I couldn't help laughing.

My first love, on the contrary, enlightened me about my first love.

Is this the person who needs to tie the bell to untie it?Or, good luck playing tricks on people?

It's a bit bitter.All of a sudden, I feel that I am old and have gone through vicissitudes, and I am no longer worthy of talking about first love.

The first love is gone, but fortunately, I can still be my confidant.

I am very glad that I have not pierced the layer of cellophane between the sea and the sea.

Maybe in the future, I can meet him once a year as an old friend.

At that time, I will chat with him about the small complaints I have accumulated on a daily basis, and he will chatter with me about trivial matters with his wife.

But - I thought of a problem.

I haven't confessed to Cang Hai that a certain girl is not a girl.

In the voice, I always refer to a certain person as "he", and it is estimated that Cang Hai has always automatically substituted "she".

Even if it wasn't deception, it must be a deliberate concealment.

There is a sense of guilt for taking advantage of Cang Hai's kindness.

Wait for this business trip to Tianjin. If the atmosphere is right, I will tell him.Or simply bring a certain one to him and ask him to check it out for me.

I just don't know, what will he do when he knows that I like men?

It's a little exciting to think about it, it must be an O'Henry-style reversal. (Let me be artistic)

Thinking of O'Henry, the collection of novels I had read for many years was long gone, so I found an audiobook to listen to, and fell asleep after listening to it.

When I woke up after an hour or two, the sound in the earphones was still going on, and it happened to be playing "Not a Close-up". After waiting for a few seconds, I heard the sentence: "We rarely marry our first love." .

Ah, I'm lying on the bed, in the posture of a literary youth.

At this time, the voice chat application sounds.

It was almost twelve o'clock.

I picked it up, and a certain one gave a few hiccups, as if I was a little drunk.

I said: where are you?

He said: Do you miss me?

I was worried that he drank too much and ignored the occasion, so I asked him where he was.

He said: I'm in the bathtub, do you miss me?

I comforted him: think a little bit.

He said: Why only a little bit?You are so mean.I miss you so much, I want to sleep with you when I go back.

Emmm... Is he really drunk, or is he taking this opportunity to flirt?

I decided to test him and said: You forgot that before you left, I just found out about your ex, and I'm still digesting it.

He felt a little caught, and said: I'm sorry, Shi Nan, it's my fault, I should have let you know earlier.

The tone is a little weak.

I said: Do you still miss them now?

He came and went for a while, and finally said flatteringly: I miss you the most now, and I just want to sleep with you.

It sounds like he has indeed slowed down his reaction and concentration due to alcohol, maybe he won't remember what I said to him now tomorrow, that's just right, I don't want him to remember some things, and I can't vomit quickly.

I said: Actually, I still have some concerns.I'm not a very fighting person, I don't want to compete with my rivals, and I don't want to compare myself with others.How could you trick me into drinking with your ex last time, what do you think?

He said: My fault, I was too, too self-assertive at the time, thinking I could kill two birds with one stone.

I said: What kills two birds with one stone?

He said: I originally thought that his eyes are sharp, so that he can see that I treat you differently, make him give up, and prove to you that I have given up on him.He understood the way I looked at you back then, didn't you notice it?

I?I said: I dare not be so narcissistic.You have such a caring ex, and two more, and they have been together for so long, I don't have much confidence in myself.

He was a little aggrieved and said: I almost lost confidence in myself.

I said: why?You are so confident.

He said: I am very good to both of them, I have never been sorry to them.Over the years, I have quarreled with my dad twice, one time because of him and one time because of him. My dad called me stupid and said that I was stupid when I talked about relationships. When I thought about it afterwards, I was really stupid.

I said: You are not stupid.

He said: I am stupid.I give them my heart and soul like an idiot, but they're still going to get married.You said they insist on getting married, is it because I am not good enough?

His tone made me feel a little distressed, and I said: You are fine.

He said: No, I am not good!If I was good enough, they wouldn't need to get married.You are with someone who is good enough, you have nothing missing, will you still get married?

I said: no.

He said: So, I am not good.

He burst into tears.

I also felt my nose a little sour, and suddenly remembered that he was still taking a bath.

I said: Put down your phone first, dry off your body, and lie down on the bed.

He hung up the voice obediently.

After a while, he sent a video invitation.

After connecting, I saw that he was already lying on the bed, his eyes were a little red, and his shoulders and chest muscles were inappropriately white.

He said: Look, I'm lying down.

The appearance made people dumbfounded, and I said: Do you have a headache?

He said: It doesn't hurt, I drank honey.

I said: Then you have a good sleep.

He said: We slept together.

I said yes, and made the same gesture as him.

He said: I will sing for you.

I laughed, is this going to sing me a lullaby?

As a result, he somehow remembered the woman flower that he mentioned last time in the car when we sang some songs and blushed.

His low voice is very suitable for singing women's flowers.

As I listened, I realized that I hadn't fully heard of women's flowers before.

I am only familiar with the first few lines of the lyrics.

The more he sang, the more I realized that this song was actually very different from what I had imagined, and it sounded very resonant.

Especially when he sang the line: "The weeds everywhere have filled the hillside, and the most painful thing is to admire oneself alone."

Especially with a certain drunken voice.

I couldn't help but hum along.

Ah, self-admiration is the most heartbreaking!