No.70 days

Later, the memory of that time became a little blurred.Shao Wu couldn't tell how he got through it, his mind was muddled, and he only remembered that Chongqing had been raining for many days.The grades came out, and he missed the exam at the end of the semester. Kris kindly calculated his usual grades for him: 46 points.Shao Wu stared at the grade slip, unable to cry, and even thought it was a bit funny: at least it wasn't zero—that would be too embarrassing.

At the beginning of July, students are on summer vacation, and the campus is getting more and more empty.The other two roommates in the dormitory went home early, leaving only Ning Xiao and Shao Wu.On the night of July 12th, it was raining again in Chongqing. Ning Xiao was lying on the bed and texting, while Shao Wu was sitting at the table in a daze.The air conditioner was turned on to 22 degrees, and goose bumps appeared on Shao Wu's arms.

"Ning Xiao," Shao Wu suddenly asked, "Do you have any cigarettes?"

"Yes, yes... But," Ning Xiao sat up, his expression a little nervous, "Either you should stop smoking, hey, what's not happy about you, just talk to me, just say it."

Shao Wu shook his head: "I have nothing to be unhappy about."

Ning Xiao stared at Shao Wu, and after a few seconds, he took out the cigarette case from under the pillow and handed it to him.

Shao Wu went to the balcony, opened the window a little, and smoked slowly.He wasn't trying to numb the pain, or simply resigned himself to degradation, he just—he just felt like he had to find something to do.You can't read the book, and there is no one to contact. Chen Yimang is far away in Shanghai, and he doesn't want to cause trouble for him.These days, as long as he is awake, the scene of that evening will be replayed in his mind over and over again. He feels that his brain is like a projector with a very sci-fi feel, projecting the memory to the fullest.The setting sun was like blood, the dark lamps, tiny flying insects, and messy cups and plates, he could even smell the cold smell of leftovers.Yang Shuyi stood in front of him, about two steps away, maybe three steps away, in short, it was not within reach.Yang Shuyi said, I'm sure I like girls, Shao Wu, but sometimes—one percent, one percent of the time, if I forget that I like girls, then the only thing I think of... seems to be you.

Yang Shuyi said again, Shaowu, we, it's impossible.

Shao Wu thought it was really like a set of riddles, or a reasoning problem.He remembered that when he was in high school, the Chinese teacher frequently emphasized a knowledge point: students, when doing classical Chinese translation, remember that "three" is not necessarily the real "three", it may be an approximate number, referring to "many".

So is Yang Shuyi's "one percent" really "one percent"?In other words, it is also an approximate number, which actually points to zero.Because we all know that one percent is a very small probability, so small that it seems to be negligible.Yang Shuyi said, [-]% of the time I forget that I like girls, in fact, I have never forgotten that I like girls—that’s right, this kind of thing is born, how can I forget?

But Shao Wu also felt that if Yang Shuyi wanted to say that he never forgot that he liked girls, then there was no need to add the phrase "I seem to think of you only".It is also possible that if Yang Shuyi's time is divided into one hundred shares, one of them will really fall on Shao Wu.Every time I think of Shao Wu, I feel a little funny, which time is it?during the class?When eating?Even, when dreaming?

Shao Wu thought about these questions over and over again, as if he was back in the third year of high school, facing a complicated Chinese comprehension.At that time, they all liked to scold the person who wrote the question for being unreasonable. It was obviously just a simple sentence, and they insisted on forcing students to analyze the complicated meaning.Only now did Shao Wu understand that life is full of speculations that are more difficult than language comprehension.

And, unlike comprehension, they have no answers.

There were only three cigarettes left in Ning Xiao's cigarette case, Shao Wu smoked two of them, and kept one for him very loyally.Then he opened the closet and started packing.

Ning Xiao grabbed the bed rail and asked cautiously: "You...you want to go home?"

Shao Wu raised his head and smiled at him: "Go to Chengdu first."

"Oh, oh..." Ning paused with a smile, frowned and asked, "Are you still planning to go to summer camp?"

"No, I'll go to Chengdu by myself for a few days."

"Then you...be careful."

Shao Wu nodded at him: "Thank you."

Tomorrow is the opening day of the Sichuan University Baoyan Summer Camp, and it stands to reason that the selected students should report.But Shaowu understood that even if he went, it would be meaningless. He failed the course, and it was impossible to get a place in the college for guaranteed research.On the day when the grades came out, the counselor specially called him to the office to inquire about the situation, thinking that the teacher made a mistake in grading, so Shao Wu had to say apologetically, no, teacher, it was my own problem.

The counselor asked, what's the problem?What's wrong?

Shao Wu said, I didn't take the exam...because of some personal matters.

The counselor wisely stopped asking any more questions, but his gaze became somewhat meaningful.Shao Wu met her gaze and said politely, teacher, then I will go back to the dormitory.

It's nothing, Shao Wu comforted himself like this, he had seen this kind of eyes when he received the admission notice three years ago.

The next day, Shao Wu arrived in Chengdu.

He did not participate in the Baoyan summer camp, but he still went to the Wangjiang campus of Sichuan University. He passed Jiuyanqiao Bar Street and walked along Wangjiang Road for a while, and he could see the bus stop sign that said "Sichuan University Station". It is the sparkling Jinjiang River.

Shao Wu wandered around the campus of Sichuan University, and heard a few girls speaking soft Chengdu dialect, discussing where to go shopping.Then Shao Wu left the school through the east gate and stood by the Jinjiang River.At this time, the night fell, and the banks of the Jinjiang River were full of twinkling lights, like a bright dream.Shao Wu was not sad, but felt a little pity.Sichuan University is a very beautiful school, and Chengdu is also a very beautiful city, but he will not come.He knew that he would not come to Chengdu, to study in graduate school, or to work here.Yang Shuyi said, Shao Wu, we are impossible.So Shao Wu knew that this time, he would not be able to follow Yang Shuyi no matter what.Because he didn't want Yang Shuyi to be troubled, nor did he want Yang Shuyi to hate him.

Shao Wu only stayed in Chengdu for one night, and didn't go to Taikoo Li or Kuanzhai Alley.In the early morning of the next day, Shao Wu got on the bus back to Chongqing.

In the car, he received a text message from Zhu Jingjing: Have you gone home yet?I finished the competition, and I just came back from Guiyang yesterday, let's make an appointment for dinner!

Shao Wu: ...Have you been in Guiyang for so long?

Zhu Jingjing: Huh?We didn't go until the day before yesterday?

Shao Wu was stunned for a while, and his fingertips began to tremble when he replied to the text message: Didn't you go to school with me on June 6?

Zhu Jingjing: No? ?Who did you listen to? ?I've been in school this semester, okay!