You don't understand the happiness of the director

In order to write this article, Wang Quan actually did a lot of preparations and had an in-depth understanding of Song Zude and everyone and everything related to him.

Because Song Zude also had several works as a director and actor. Although his reputation was worse than his face, there were some useful comments that made Wang Quan fully understand Song Zude.

Including but not limited to the scolding with Guo Degang, who was criticized to the point where he could no longer take care of himself, and the death of director Xie Jin, who spread rumors about his brother Liu Xinda two years later. This also strengthened Wang Quan's determination to scold this clown. , Mader, don’t you know that “Wreaths Under the Mountain” is one of my favorite movies!

At the beginning, "Haha, I didn't expect to see a new article so soon. I actually didn't expect it myself. I have to thank Teacher Song Zhude."

"I saw a news headline online a few days ago, saying that a senior sister in our film school is a surname changer, and it caused an uproar on the Internet. I can testify that it is true, and many alumni know about it!"

"Because I know this senior sister somewhat. She used to take her father's surname An, but now she takes her mother's surname Liu. Why doesn't she think she has changed her surname? I was surprised at that time. This is worthy of discussion on the Internet. Song Teacher, don’t you have a person with a different surname in your family?”

"Your brother Liu Xinda, whose original name is Song Zuxing, not only has his surname changed, but his name has also changed."

"By the way, why do you two brothers pretend not to know each other? Is it to appear objective and fair when you are complimenting each other?"

Song Zude did not do it alone. He had a very famous hype partner named Liu Xinda, who was a writer and also made shoes (laughs).

The identity of a writer made Liu Xinda appear very authoritative. With his cooperation and assistance, some of Song Zude's shocking words were able to fool some people, and China's population base was too large, so momentum gradually formed.

Liu Xinda's real identity is Song Zuxing, Song Zude's cousin. She was adopted into Song Zude's family since she was a child. The two cousins ​​look like twins, but no netizens noticed the problem, so Wang Quan was the first to expose it. A thorough popularization of science.

Then Wang Quan continued, "Oh, just reading one title made me think so much. The content must be quite exciting, so I patiently continued to read Teacher Song's article, and then I realized that I had read it wrong. It was about transgender, not transgender. Changed my surname! It turns out that my senior sister is actually my senior brother!"

"I have no way of knowing whether this is true or not, but I still want to believe it is true. After all, how could Teacher Song lie to others? If he made up such rumors about a little girl, wouldn't he become a bastard? , scum, beasts, stinky shit.”

"But if Teacher Song is not a bastard, a scumbag, a beast, or a stinky piece of shit, you should still come up with evidence in time, instead of touching your upper lip to your lower lip. Well, this action seems a bit difficult for Teacher Song. Your teeth are too prominent. It shouldn't be closed.

"Although I have never seen Teacher Song's true face, I have admired Teacher Song's photos. The pair of front teeth are so ingenious that I often imagine him doing some work in the kitchen opening bottles and cans without using any tools. A pair of front teeth Poke it down, build roads over mountains and build bridges over rivers. You can't do anything, even the kitchen knife can be put away.

"Besides, this face irritates the painter to death and the carpenter to death. Lu Ban has to cry when he comes. The threads are hanging from all sides and cannot be turned out. It looks like he has drunk diabetes. It is really amazing. How can a human face look like this? The symbol, if you look closely, looks like a pelvis, with a pair of eyes that are very lively, like chestnuts, with the bottom facing up, connected to the bladder, the tip facing down, attached to the pubic symphysis, and that mouth..." (Note 1)

"Oh, I'm going too far, it's all because Teacher Song is too abstract, making people always think about it.

"Back to the topic, we definitely believe that Teacher Song is not a bastard, a scumbag, a beast, or a stinky piece of shit, but public figures still have to provide evidence when speaking, they cannot make nonsense, and they must be worthy of their face. No, I thought of Teacher Song again. That face, makes me laugh for a while.

"Okay now. I have been professionally trained. I generally don't laugh unless I can't help it. Let's use an analogy. Take Teacher Song as an example. If you don't need evidence to speak, then I can say this. In fact, Teacher Song He is also a transgender person. Yes, yes, he is actually her. I didn’t expect it. In the United States, I personally saw Mr. Song causing trouble at the plastic surgery hospital, and it even made local news. It turned out that he was asking the plastic surgery hospital to refund his money. Said that the other party made him look too ugly.

"According to the reporter's interview, Teacher Song turned out to be a woman, but because she was ugly, she had not found a partner even in her thirties. The village introduced her to an old bachelor who was in his forties or fifties and had nothing to choose from. But when he saw her He was vomiting dryly, and his legs were shaking and almost paralyzed.

"Reluctantly, Teacher Song's parents suggested that she change gender and become a man, which would be the perfect way to pass on the old Song family's surname. After all, her brother has changed his surname to Liu, so the Song family can only rely on her, so that the old Song family can have The two changed their genders, and they are simply shining brightly on the family line."

"But who would have thought that Teacher Song, who had transformed into a man, was still so ugly and couldn't find a girlfriend. In anger, he even caused a scene in the plastic surgery hospital in the United States, which embarrassed all the people in the United States. At that time, my classmates asked me about it, and I was shocked. Call him the Neon Man.”

"The above is the rumor I demonstrated. Since it does not require photos or evidence, it only relies on imagination, so the sequence and transition are very smooth and flawless. It is simply the embryo of a good script. It can be used for suspense and literature. , but I can never do comedy, because I am a professional and generally don’t laugh unless I can’t bear it... hahaha.

"I am indeed worthy of being the screenwriter selected by the Oscars! Okay, let's call it a day and go to bed."

I finished the article in one go, published it, refreshed it, and saw the first comment.

Jiu Guhuo Pain Po: Huh? Is the sofa mine? !

Instead of "I'm not Liu Yifei", Wang Quan immediately lost interest, ignored the netizen, put his arms around Gadot and fell asleep.

~

Domestic, Beijing.

Liu Yifei thought that she could settle the matter by not responding, but she didn't expect that the matter would become more and more serious.

Yesterday, she participated in a program to promote Shendiao. The host asked about the topic of transgender in a very rude manner. Her angry mother took her away and interrupted the recording, which made Zhang Jizhong who was present at the time very embarrassed.

Even some students in the class looked at me in a wrong way. Although they didn't say anything, they were definitely wondering what kind of species they were. Only Yawen was protecting himself very carefully. He was such a good person.

If it was just like this, Liu Yifei felt that she could still hold on, but she was afraid that Wang Quan, who was far away in the United States, would also hear about it and even believe it.

Later, Liu Yifei thought about it. If junior Wang Quan knew about it, he would definitely ask Mimi immediately. Then as long as he made Mimi believe that she was innocent, Wang Quan would not have unreasonable doubts.

Oops, why am I getting smarter and smarter recently? Is it secondary development?

Liu Yifei smugly went to the dormitory downstairs to look for Yang Mi. Yuan Shanshan in the dormitory said she was not there, then stood up and wanted to get close to Liu Yifei, but she didn't dare, with a tangled expression.

Liu Yifei walked straight up to her and slapped Yuan Shanshan on the butt unexpectedly, "Okay, I'm leaving, junior sister."

"ah!"

As soon as Liu Yifei left, Yuan Shanshan screamed out and stared blankly at the place where she was touched. At this moment, she felt that she was unclean!

Liu Yifei, who has a secondary brain development, guessed that today was not the weekend and there were many freshman classes, so Mimi should have gone to Wang Quan's secret cabin.

So she walked over and knocked on the door. It took a long time before she heard a response.

"Who?"

"Mimi, it's me, Art Concubine."

"Ah!" The voice inside seemed surprised, and then I heard the sound of someone hurriedly sorting something out.

After a while, Yang Mi opened the door and welcomed Liu Yifei in, "Yifei, why are you here? Are you okay?"

Liu Yifei looked at Yang Mi's obviously red face and asked strangely, "Mimi, what are you doing?"

"It's nothing, I'm sleeping~" She stretched her waist and surprised Liu Yifei at the same time.

Liu Yifei noticed the computer here. She walked over and touched the computer host. It was hot.

"Were you online just now?"

"No, no."

"You are just surfing the Internet!" Liu Yifei pressed forward step by step, "Tell me, are you also reading posts about me?"

ah?

Liu Yifei didn't look angry. She spread her hands and said, "Look, look. If the Internet says you are a boy, I will definitely be curious."

Yang Mi, "I'm not curious, I don't believe it at all."

"Oh, you're really not curious? I originally wanted to prove it to you." Liu Yifei suddenly smiled mischievously.

"ah!"

Yang Mi sat down next to Liu Yifei, "Is it true? How do you want to prove it?"

Liu Yifei dug into her bag and said, "Please take a look!"

"cell phone?"

Liu Yifei, "It's a photo on the phone."

Next, Liu Yifei showed Yang Mi her childhood photos, the kind of paper photos taken with a mobile phone. There were dozens of photos from childhood to adulthood. They were all dressed up like little girls, with pigtails and skirts. They were cute and lovable. It's pity, and you can tell it's a beauty embryo at a very young age. It looks similar to now, and you can tell it's the same person at a glance.

Yang Mi was speechless for a while, "You are too narcissistic to put so many photos of your childhood on your phone."

Liu Yifei asked, "Don't you have it on your phone?"

"No, maybe it's on my mother's phone, and you can't explain the problem."

"Doesn't this explain the problem?"

Yang Mi, "What if you have been a transvestite since childhood."

Liu Yifei, "wtf!" She was so angry that she almost cursed in English. How can she still understand this! (Note 2)

"Then how can you believe it?" If you don't believe it, how can Wang Quan believe it? If Wang Quan doesn't believe it, how can I make progress!

"It's not impossible,"

(Note 1: This is based on Guo Degang’s article scolding Song Zude. The original article is eloquent and has a thousand words. It is far more enjoyable than what I have seen so far. Guo can be called the master of the world of scolding.

Note 2: wtf: what the fuck, what the hell)