Original Sin (2)
When I opened my eyes, I felt an indescribable discomfort and pain.
Twisting my neck, which didn’t move well, to look down at my body, what is this?
My arms and legs were in casts. I could move if I wanted to, but it would take considerable courage.
It would be impossible unless I broke all these plaster pieces.
“Ugh…”
I finally woke up, but there’s nothing I can do. All I can do is kill time staring at the ceiling.
As I was blankly staring at the dull brown ceiling, someone finally entered the room.
“It’s been a while, Claire.”
“……”
“Can you call someone?”
“……”
“Hey, say something.”
“……”
Claire stared at me intently, then quietly sat down in a chair in the corner and started reading a book.
Is she not going to call anyone? Or should I be grateful that she doesn’t kill me while I’m defenseless?
“Ahem! It’s a bit stuffy. Can you open the window?”
“Sigh…”
Claire, who had been quietly reading her book, finally stood up.
For a moment, I felt a slight chill as she silently approached me.
I felt relieved as I watched her walk straight to the window.
But then…
Clack!
The window opened.
Swoosh──
Rain started coming in.
Claire adjusted the sliding window while quietly staring at me.
With the window open, Claire crossed her arms and watched me.
“Ah, right. It’s my fault. Sorry, but could you close the window?”
Are you complaining now?
I knew you didn’t like me, but this is too much.
“Linnea got hurt.”
“I know.”
“Because of you.”
“Why is it my fault? It’s because of that brat who showed up at an unexpected time.”
Bang!
The window closes again.
Then, grabbing a nearby towel, you dry my wet hair and lay it down.
Giving the disease and the cure, well done.
“I didn’t even run away.”
Drip.
This time, you pour water. Until a moment ago, it seemed like you were venting your anger.
Just as I thought that, Claire herself gulps down the water.
“Phew. You didn’t give it your all, did you?”
“……”
“What kind of nuisance is this? Are you crazy to die?”
“You have pretty good eyes.”
“From a distance, you can see it clearly. You didn’t use your sword, and you didn’t use your gun. If you weren’t going to give it your all, shouldn’t you have at least run away?”
“I have nothing to say.”
“But you’re still talking.”
“……”
The kid wasn’t this bad before… What on earth made this kid such a sharp-tongued person?
Who on earth had such a bad influence on the kid?
It couldn’t be Linnea, she’s too kind, and Titan is too stupid for that.
“Anyway, stay quiet until your wound heals. And in the meantime, finish organizing your thoughts.”
“My thoughts are already organized.”
“In your dreams?”
“Yeah. No, wait, something’s off with your tone. Anyway, I’ve reached a conclusion.”
After answering, I saw Claire’s mocking face. It was a sarcastic question, but I answered seriously.
“So, what’s the conclusion?”
“Let’s become a punching bag.”
“Oh dear, I didn’t know you hurt your head too. You should ask your sister to take a look when she comes back.”
“Well, that was a joke. But I think we need to talk first, no matter what.”
“Will she listen?”
“So what I said earlier was both a joke and not a joke.”
“……”
Contempt.
In a way, it’s impressive.
Because the moment when hatred towards me was surpassed by the emotion of contempt.
“Do you hate me?”
“Should I like you?”
“For killing your brother?”
“……Don’t speak so carelessly. How, how can you say that in front of me…!”
Claire reacts violently.
In fact, until now, we both tried not to talk about Burke.
Because we knew that topic would only cause wounds.
Claire must have also suppressed her anger by not bringing up that topic.
But in this situation, I brought it up. I forcibly pushed the situation we were avoiding.
“Don’t you want to kill me?”
“Do you call that a question?”
I realized that I had to face the hatred. This ambiguous relationship was for Claire, but in a way, it was also my escape because I didn’t know what to do.
This can’t go on.
Leaving this hatred unattended will only result in incomplete combustion.
I was unconsciously repeating the same relationship with Claire as before.
The only difference is that I am somewhat justified in the face of Burke’s death.
I was the only one who felt comfortable.
“You must know the reason why I had to kill Burke by now.”
“……”
Claire glares at me.
Yes, she knows it too. That’s why she’s been suppressing her anger like this.
For me, it was right to kill Burke. But for Claire, he was her only family.
Claire is now torn between the judgment that it was the right thing to do and the hatred that her family was murdered.
“I gave Burke two choices back then.”
So I said.
First, a conversation. A process that must precede to find the problem.
I laid out the specific process that I hadn’t bothered to explain to Claire.
“So, I killed Burke.”
To keep my promise with him, I decided to take you in. My story ends here for now.
In a way, it’s an excuse.
Now, the person who has to make a judgment about it is Claire.
“Then tell me now. Why didn’t you kill me?”
“……”
“If you had taken that dagger and stabbed me, you could have done it anytime.”
A dagger lies on the bedside table. No matter how you look at it, it’s an unnatural object to be in this place.
It wasn’t brought in just now.
Claire had clearly entered the room holding a book. She had brought the dagger in and left it there.
That means it was a situation where it didn’t matter if she left the dagger like that.
In other words, it was a situation where she could have killed me.
“Bringing that means you intended to kill me. Seeing that I’m still alive, you must have changed your mind midway. Did you have a change of heart?”
The plan to kill me wouldn’t have been an impulsive decision.
If she were someone who acted on impulse, she would have done it long ago.
She must have assessed the situation and realized it was an opportunity that wouldn’t come again, and weighed her options.
As a result, she decided to take this opportunity to get revenge on me, but in the end, she couldn’t carry it out.
“……”
Claire starts to sob, clutching the hem of her skirt.
“You……!”
She probably doesn’t even understand her own actions.
Even though she concluded that she had to take revenge, she overturned it at the last moment.
“……Because you called your brother’s name.”
“Me?”
“While you were sleeping. I wondered why you were listing people’s names.”
“I didn’t know I had that habit.”
The names I called must have been the names of the demons I had dealt with.
Not simple villains, but those who, like Burke, had been turned into demons by their circumstances.
They succumbed to the temptation before them just to survive. They gained power but did not wield it against others.
Yet, they had to be killed.
I couldn’t leave ticking time bombs that could go off at any moment.
They were people I didn’t want to kill. But that was my job.
To kill such people.
“I could feel your voice trembling…….”
If you ask if I regret it, I don’t. I did what I had to do.
But if you ask if it was hard……
Undoubtedly, it was hard enough to be unbearable. I thought I was okay after receiving counseling from the saint, but it seems I still couldn’t shake it off from deep within my heart.
It must be because I learned the hidden story of the <Eroding One>.
“Was it painful to kill your brother?”
“……Yes. I don’t regret it, but it was definitely something I didn’t want to do.”
“I see. Why did you do it then? Why do something so painful…….”
“Because it was what I had to do.”
“What is it that you do?”
“Choosing the lesser evil among the worst and the lesser evil.”
“…….”
It’s not just me.
There are many such jobs in this world.
If someone strives for the best, someone else has to strive to avoid the worst.
And in avoiding the worst, one inevitably faces the lesser evil.
From noble mtl dot com
This world doesn’t always have a happy ending like a fairy tale.
“I thought I was the only one mourning my brother’s death.”
The principle behind Claire Ryan’s actions.
“I thought I should be sad. I thought I should be angry about my brother’s death. That’s what I was thinking.”
A heart for the family.
Even if she didn’t want to, she thought she was the only one in this world who could do it.
She didn’t want Burke’s death to be a death that no one cared about. To give that death meaning and make it a destination.
It was the best effort she could show to Burke.
“But now I don’t know. I thought I would know if I followed you, but now I know even less.”
“Can you forgive me?”
“I guess I should. Someday, I should. But right now, I can’t. I still hate you, and I still can’t accept my brother’s death.”
“You and I have a long way to go.”
We should have done this sooner.
We should have talked about the feelings we had for each other.
Whether it was Claire or me, we are only now standing at the starting line.
From now on, Claire will try to turn her hatred into forgiveness. I have to be a good person so that her decision doesn’t waver.
“So don’t die. I haven’t decided what conclusion I’ll come to yet. Whether I kill you or forgive you, it won’t mean anything if you’re not alive.”
“Yes, I’ll keep that in mind.”
“Don’t ever think of doing something stupid like this again. If you don’t want to make my resolve futile.”
“The conclusion is similar.”
“What?”
“No, just saying.”
-Have you ever thought about this? If the enemy you prepared for revenge with all your might just stupidly offers their neck, wouldn’t you be unbearably angry?
As expected, the closest aide to the saint.
Or did the saint perfectly understand Claire?
I don’t know which one.
Maybe even that conversation was just a flashy pretense I had in my dream.
“Then I should be someone easy for you to decide on.”
“I hope you become the worst b*stard in the world. Then I’ll gladly stab your neck.”
“Then I should aim to be a saint. It’s a disgrace to die to someone who can’t even hold a dagger properly.”
I laughed as I faced Claire. It was a sneer at each other.
But within that sneer, there was certainly a bit of affection.
“Then here’s the main point. The guy who made me like this this time, who is he?”
“Does it matter since I’m not the one fighting anyway?”
“Well, in some ways, he resembles you and at the same time, he resembles Burke.”
A guy who holds a grudge against me.
He became a demon unwillingly. He was forced to make a decision by the inquisitor.
It’s truly amazing. One person holds all those emotions.
“What do you think you should do?”
To someone who has similar wounds as you. How should you approach them?
* * *
“…Did you need a guard?”
The hunter who followed to guard Linea was panting.
Linea has grace. Not just personally, but the entire hunter guild is indebted to her.
Not only did the expensive doctor treat them for free, but she also ran around making efforts.
Even though she was in a state of severe injury herself. There were no life-threatening injuries, but there were those who might not be able to work as hunters anymore.
Linea saved many people.
That’s why when she said she was going out of the city to gather herbs, he followed with a happy heart.
Those herbs were also for taking care of the injured, weren’t they?
But…
“Huff… Huff…”
Linea’s stamina far exceeded what the hunter had expected.
He had heard that the physical abilities of beastmen were excellent.
But Linea’s movements were lighter than he had anticipated.
She was running lightly through the mountains, and just following her was enough to make him breathless.
“I should have noticed when she was running around treating the kids.”
His mouth tasted bitter.
He had never hunted this hard. If he had known, he would have left it to a stronger hunter.
He had detailed knowledge of the state outside the city and thought there were no particular threats, so he followed… but…
“Oh dear.”
The hunter gritted his teeth and followed Linea, thinking he had to repay the grace.
Of course, contrary to his determination, his body was honest. Soon, the hunter who lost sight of Linea began to search around anxiously.
It didn’t seem like anything would happen. There was no problem since the person herself was also being careful about safety.
There was no information that the damn kid who caused trouble in the city had left the city.
In some sense, the outside of the city could be safer than the inside.
Therefore, the only thing driving him was responsibility and face.
Swish!
“Have you been waiting long?”
“Whoa! You scared me!”
The hunter, who was panting and searching the surroundings, was startled and stepped back at the sight of Linea who suddenly appeared in front of him.
If it had been a beast instead of Linea that appeared now, he would have been dead.
“Ahem! Have you gathered everything, sir?”
“Not everything… but I think I found something more important.”
“Pardon?”
Linea held out the herbs she had gathered in front of the hunter’s eyes.
The hunter recognized the herbs.
They were common herbs used for bruises, effective enough to be worth collecting a few roots when found along the way.
‘Why did she pick these?’
Of course, the important point here was that they were common.
These could be easily obtained without having to come out to gather them.
If she had wanted, the hunter’s guild would have given them to her for free.
Did she notice the hunter’s doubt? Linea quietly added.
“These are poisonous herbs.”
“…Pardon?”
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