So you're not really happy

chapter81 monologue

The moonlight outside the window is soft, the twilight is vast, and the depths of the night are deep and vast. Wei Ling sat on the balcony on the second floor and looked outside quietly. On such a reunion day, she was alone at home.

Wei Ling was immersed in such a silent loneliness for a moment, until the bell rang suddenly, like a needle piercing the silent night, she reflexively looked along the light, and saw that it was Shen Zhian calling, with a trace of Surprised, Wei Ling picked up the phone.

Shen Zhian over there didn't seem to be able to react, as if the call wasn't from her, and he didn't say a word for a long while.

Wei Ling was surprised, and called out in doubt, "Xiao An?"

Hearing the voice from the microphone, Shen Zhi'an seemed to be awakened, and responded abruptly: "Wei...Wei Ling." After calling her name, he didn't know what to say, so he just kept silent in embarrassment.

Wei Ling laughed in a low voice, and asked, "What's the matter? Have you guys eaten yet?"

"Well," Shen Zhi'an responded, and said again: "I just want to greet Grandma Zhao, is she there?"

Hearing what she said, Wei Ling got up in a panic, wanted to explain again, thought for a while, and said a little stumbled: "Ah! So you are looking for grandma, then... let me ask her for you, she should have a rest... ..."

Shen Zhi'an was a little strange, "Did you rest so early? Today is the holiday, grandma likes this kind of day the most, and she usually goes to bed very late to pray for her family."

……

Wei Ling wandered around the room, but his pace slowed down bit by bit, probably because the atmosphere was too stiff, Wei Ling thought for a while and said: "Xiao'an, the wood carving I gave you..."

As soon as he said this, Wei Ling felt a little regretful, and felt that it was really unwise to talk about this topic, but Shen Zhian sighed slightly, and said helplessly: "You are still thinking about your wood carving, I will ask Kong Kong to bring it to you tomorrow. go back."

Wei Ling hurriedly said: "No, that's not what I mean. Since I gave it to you, I will definitely not want it back. I'm afraid, I'm afraid you will really throw it away."

He then explained: "Do you remember, I gave you one when I was a child, but later, it was crushed by a car. I remember you were still very sad at that time."

When Wei Ling talked about the wood carving from before, Shen Zhian instantly remembered it, Feng Chen's memory was awakened by a few words, he couldn't help but smile a little, and said after a while: "That's why you thought of giving me this?"

Wei Ling didn't answer immediately, but said slowly: "When I was young, I learned woodcarving from an older sister. Every time she gave it to me, I sold it for money. Later, she found out and decided to teach me woodcarving. When I learned it, she left."

Shen Zhi'an seemed to hear her talking about her childhood very rarely, and couldn't help asking: "What happened later? Haven't you seen her again?"

Wei Ling shook his head, and suddenly remembered that Shen Zhian couldn't see, so he said: "She... is dumb and can't speak. She said she wanted to make money and treat diseases so that she could speak. Later, she left with a doctor. At that time, I My mother remarried to my stepfather. He sometimes beat me and scolded me with those dirty words. He thought I was a burden. Later, when I did this at home, my mother saw me. She... smashed all the wood carvings I made Yes, my mother, she wants me to be famous, she has high expectations for me, and even stole my stepfather’s money to send me to school, since then, I haven’t touched those woods again,…”

Wei Ling felt very strange at this moment. It was obviously a painful past that she didn't want to recall, but it seemed like sporadic old things shaken out of the grave, so she said it plainly.

A lot of things are like the tide on the coast, which surges up from time to time and can cause her pain for a long time, but now it is gone without a trace, and it is difficult to arouse the waves in her heart.

Listening to what Wei Ling said, Shen Zhian seemed to see a different Wei Ling, who was far from the Wei Ling he knew before, and couldn't even imagine how Wei Ling would live in such an environment. How old are you, seven years old?eight years old?Still nine years old?It was the age of being playful, Shen Zhi'an thought about those precious pictures left in his memory, and felt that his memory was a little messed up for a moment.

Shen Zhian was silent for a while, then suddenly asked: "Wei Ling, are you afraid?"

"What?" Wei Ling didn't expect Shen Zhian to ask such a question suddenly, and was a little dazed until Shen Zhian asked again.

This time she heard it clearly, and smiled softly, "Whatever, it's over."

What he said was calm and calm, as if those years of torture day after day had become a passing cloud and were not important anymore.

Shen Zhi'an chewed these words carefully, not knowing what to say for a while.

However, Wei Ling took a deep breath, and slowly said: "Xiao'an, when I was young, I made a promise that I would only carve wood for the people I love. When I first came to Shen's house, you treated me sincerely. I can feel it. , and at that time, I also... paid my heart..."

Shen Zhi'an heard Wei Ling saying this, and said sullenly: "It doesn't make any sense to say these things now."

Wei Ling paused, and said with a little self-mockery: "Yes! It doesn't make sense anymore."

At this time, Shen Zhian suddenly said: "Actually, I just saw the text message you sent me before."

Seeing her suddenly mentioning the text message, Wei Ling was stunned for a moment, then remembered what Shen Zhian said, and suddenly understood why Shen Zhian gave up the guardianship of Kong Kong so simply, she said a little ashamed: "What did you say? Did you not read those text messages? At that time, I really didn’t hire a lawyer, and I didn’t want to compete with you for custody rights. I just wanted to take the opportunity to make up for you by saying those things. I... I am a single mother I have a deep understanding of the white eyes and discrimination of the children I gave birth to, but I will never let you bear it, Xiaoan, I feel that I really owe you in this life."

After such a long time, hearing this belated explanation again, Shen Zhi'an was a little dazed, and couldn't help thinking, if he hadn't dropped his phone in a panic at that time, perhaps all the farce would not have happened.

Wei Ling continued: "However, I still thank you for allowing me to spend those wonderful times with Kongkong. I think this will be the best memory in my life. Since I met you that time, I have Kongkong again. , I just discovered that children are always different to their parents. I even... can experience the same feelings as you, and can truly feel that he is constantly growing. These... are things I have never I've experienced it." At the end, Wei Ling's eyes were a little moist, and those words were said without any scruples, which made her feel relieved.

Shen Zhi listened to her quietly, as if he was really thinking about the meaning of her words, and after a while, he said: "Actually, it's good for you to be with Kong Kong, at least he didn't reject you. The reason why I asked you to take care of him is because of your relationship with him, if Kong Kong grows up and finds that his mother is just a mediocre designer, I am really afraid that he will feel...that I have missed his future."

Wei Ling shook his head in disapproval when he heard this, "None of these things, you must know the importance of a mother to a child, so you have to believe that Kongkong must love you very much!"

Wei Ling's last words made Shen Zhi'an unable to hold back tears. Holding back the tears, she smiled and said, "What's wrong with you today? Are you drunk again?"

Fearing that Shen Zhi'an was targeting her with some truth in his words, Wei Ling quickly denied it, "No, no, last time, I was really careless."

Hearing what she said, Shen Zhian suddenly remembered the purpose of his call, so he asked: "By the way, didn't you go to find grandma? If she is resting, don't bother her."

Wei Ling seemed relieved, and said, "It's okay, I will greet her on your behalf."

Only then did Shen Zhi'an nodded in satisfaction, at this moment he suddenly felt that the phone in his hand was a little warm, thinking that it was getting late, so he said: "It's not too early now, you should rest too!"

Wei Ling was a little unfinished, but Shen Zhi'an talked about this, so she could only hang up the phone reluctantly, "Well, Xiao An, happy Mid-Autumn Festival!"

This time Shen Zhi'an didn't hang up too early, instead he responded warmly: "You too, happy holidays!"

Shen Zhian hung up the phone, walked to the window, and suddenly heard a "bang" from outside, and the fireworks bloomed brilliantly in the sky, and then slowly fell.

The good things are only for a moment, and soon they will return to silence.

There was a sound from the entrance, Shen Zhian had just walked out when Kongkong ran over and hugged her leg, shouting excitedly: "Mom, why didn't you come? The fireworks over there are so beautiful."

Shen Zhian patted his head and didn't speak.

When giving Kong Kong a bath at night, Shen Zhian asked Kong Kong: "Kongkong, your little mother—" Speaking of this, Shen Zhian herself was a little surprised. I don't know when, she also began to acquiesce in Wei Ling as Kongkong's little mother. See Kongkong Looking up at her blankly, Shen Zhi'an hurriedly said: "Your little mother...why did you send you back? Do you know?"

She was also asking, and didn't intend to ask anything from Kong Kong's mouth, but Kong Kong nodded and said: "I know! Mom, because Grandma and Mrs. Wang have been taken home for the holidays, Grandma Wang and Grandpa Wang are going to see Their grandson, my mother said she can’t cook, so she’s too embarrassed to tell you.” At this point, Kong Kong smiled mischievously, “The dumplings made by my mother are so unpalatable, they will rot in the pot!”

Shen Zhi'an suddenly stopped, she looked at Kong Kong with some surprise, "Is this true? Over there... is there only your little mother?"

"That's right!" Kongkong nodded, and said to himself, "I just don't know if my little mom will be lonely by herself. I usually play with her, but now she can only play by herself."

Shen Zhi'an didn't come to his senses for a long time. No wonder Wei Ling faltered when she mentioned greeting Granny Zhao just now. It turned out that Granny Zhao wasn't resting, but was not at home at all. Didn't Wei Ling stay alone all the time? At home, on days like this, without relatives or company, she couldn't imagine how Wei Ling would feel if he didn't make that phone call.

Thinking of this, Shen Zhian suddenly felt a little uncomfortable.