touch the back of the unknown

Extra Story——He Yi, who has suffered a big somersault, does not want to get up, but is nostalgic for the warmth and tolerance of the land.

He Yi fell.

He Yi really fell.

He Yi was desperate.

He Yi felt that he was finished.

No way, He Yi, no way, no way, you can’t plant you and you’re finished, He Yi wailed in his heart, and then He Yi replied indifferently, it’s not that I’m finished, but the person who made me plant is finished .

But He Yi couldn't bear to let that person die, so he had to make himself uncomfortable.

He Yi has been controlling his emotions, he is clear about his situation, he can't be too obsessed with anything, otherwise it will ruin it and himself.

He Yi has always been a person who can be cruel to himself, but most of the time he won't be cruel.He's a scum, a total scum, but only sometimes.

He Yi has never been a person with multiple personalities. He knows that everything in his body is himself, but one part of himself is in conflict with another part, and it is a little more obvious than others.

Just not a little...

But He Yi fell, really fell, he thought he would never carry it, but he was too naive.

If he knew that there would be this ending, he would have cut off all possibilities at the very beginning, and he would have done it, but there is no if.

There are no ifs in the world.

He Yi was bored thinking, when did he fall in love with Yan Wu, the first time he saw him in the corridor?Or when Yan Wu casually exposed his hypocrisy after school?Or when Yan Wu kept coming to him for a semester?Or when Yan Wu apologized loudly to him in the dark?Or was it at Yan Wu's house, when Yan Wu was in the sun?Or, was he about to commit suicide that day, but met Yan Wu, when Yan Wu reached out his hand when he was desperate?

He has been working hard to suppress his budding feelings, I am a scumbag, a big scumbag, he said to himself, because I am a scumbag, I cannot like Yan Wu.

He didn't consider that falling in love with someone would cause him a nervous breakdown, but he considered that if he fell in love with Yan Wu, he would be unable to restrain himself from hurting him. If he did something wrong to Yan Wu when he was emotionally unstable Things that have evolved countless times in my head... I will kill myself, He Yi thought, I can't hurt Yan Wu.

But he really couldn't help himself thinking of Yan Wu's face, his ass, and his chest muscles when he was in sex, and he couldn't control the beauty in his heart when he heard Yan Wu's voice, damn it , like a girl in Huaichun.

That time at the Century Square, he and Yan Wu went to eat pizza, along the way He Yi was in a state he was familiar with, a state that often appeared when he was alone, he was innocent like a child, smiling So real and pure, holding Yan Wu's hand on the way back, He Yi had a warm and bright smile on his face, until Yan Wu said, "I'm leaving."

He Yi kept his hands in a daze, but Yan Wu let go of his hands unexpectedly, making He Yi unable to react for a while.

He made a voice that was completely different from the expression on his face: "Goodbye."

He watched Yan Wu walk away, feeling something sprouting in his heart.

His expression gradually changed, turning back to the same indifferent scum he was familiar with.

He sneered coldly, turned around and walked into the community, with a familiar whine coming from his throat, timid and naive, he was irrational and couldn't control his feelings for Yan Wu, but he could, a cold, twisted, sick As for a scheming person, the most important thing is that he has reason - of course he can control everything.

Suddenly, another familiar voice came out of his throat, a frivolous, hypocritical but equally sensible voice.

"It's useless, we can't escape, and neither can you."

We are one, and this one loves Yan Wu, so you too.

If you don't like him, why would you want to control your feelings? Don't you like him the most? Sick, bloodthirsty, tyrannical, twisted, this is you, the voice laughed, don't be stupid, you are too I know, you like him, so you have to control yourself not to hurt him, control yourself not to like him, but you are liking him like this, you can't control it at all, you will only fall into an endless loop, if you don't like him—— You can still hurt him.

Then what should I do?

What to do... He Yi looked blankly at the sky, what to do.

That's it, don't hurt him.

Well, don't hurt him.

Try your best, try your best, He Yi thought, feeling his hands were numb from the cold.

He Yi breathed out on his hand, and walked quickly towards home.