light in the north

Jiang Nan's eyes became moist all of a sudden.

But he still didn't speak, and looked at Shen Bei quietly.

Shen Bei also looked at Jiang Nan, looking into the depths of his eyes.There was a villain inside this man, beating his body all the time, frantically trying to get out of it, but this man was stubborn and trapped him with his body.

There's no way he's going to be depressed like this.When Shen Bei was thinking about this sentence, he realized that it was so contradictory and ridiculous compared to his original thought.

"If you want to die so much." Shen Bei said, "then why don't you die?"

Before Jiang Nan fainted, she asked Shen Bei if he should die.

But Shen Bei didn't answer him. Now, he threw the question back to Jiang Nan.

Life is a very complicated and big proposition, and death is not a difficult problem for people with depression.Because for him, only death is the liberation.

If a mentally ill person really wants to die, he won't survive until now.

Jiang Nan's eyes just flickered, and after a long, long time, he slowly got up from the bed.

"where are you going?"

Shen Bei asked.

Jiang Nan took off the infusion bottle, put on her shoes, and replied, "Toilet."

Does it look like it's back to normal?

Shen Bei sat on the head of the bed, watching Jiang Nan disappear into the ward by himself.

At first he thought that Jiang Nan was just peeing, but the longer the barrier time waited, Shen Bei felt a little uneasy.Jiang Nan didn't answer the question he asked before.But Shen Bei knew what this question meant to Jiang Nan.

Shen Bei had to become ruthless, so that Jiang Nan would collapse again and again.

Because that's why he woke up from a vegetative state, and that's why he's able to sit here again now.

But as time passed, he became uncontrollable and became a little nervous.

Maybe...he wasn't ready for Jiang Nan to leave so soon.

Shen Bei suddenly stood up and walked outside. He rushed to the door and stopped in a hurry. He hesitated a few times, but he still clenched his fists and took a step, passing through the passing patients.

"anyone there?"

He knocked on the toilet doors one by one, and the first ones were all locked. Someone yelled inside, but it wasn't Jiang Nan. When he walked to the back two, someone just came out, and the last one , but no one answered no matter how hard I knocked, but the door was locked again.

"Jiang Nan?!"

Shen Bei frowned and beat vigorously, but no one responded for a long time. He saw the man who had come out of the toilet next to him wash his hands and was about to go out.Shen Bei grabbed him, "Did you see a 1.8-meter-tall, skinny guy with a bottle coming in just now?"

"I've seen it before." The man said, "He went into the toilet you just photographed, but he should go, I've been squatting with constipation for a long time...!"

Before the man finished speaking, Shen Bei rushed over and kicked open the last toilet door. Not surprisingly, he saw Jiang Nan squatting there.The bottle was thrown on the ground, a lot of blood flowed back, and his wrist was almost scratched by the needle.The blood was still dripping down.

"Are you fucking crazy!?"

When Shen Bei saw it, he lost his mind and became angry. He picked up Jiang Nan and walked outside.

Jiang Nan leaned on Shen Bei's shoulder, and said coldly: "Didn't you want me to die?"

He never knew that Jiang Nan struggled countless times with nightmares and loss of vision. Death was not a terrible thing for him, but every time he wanted to die, he would tell himself.

Shen Bei doesn't like death, he can't be with Shen Bei after he dies, and he still wants to find Shen Bei alive.

He's dead, who will love Shen Bei forever?

So for Jiang Nan, he lived for Shen Bei for the rest of his life.

He suffered for so long without gaining anything, if Shen Bei asked him to die, he would do the same.

Jiang Nan used to be very afraid, very afraid of cutting his wrist with a knife, because the memory of his childhood stimulated him so deeply, but at this moment, when he really pierced and cut his wrist with a needle, suddenly he was not afraid anymore .

Instead he felt relief and happiness.

Isn't this from the beginning to the end?

He is a person who lives from one end to the end.

"When will I let you die.

Shen Bei trotted in the hospital corridor, cold sweat rolled down his forehead, he gritted his teeth, and said viciously, "You made me so miserable, how could I let you die so easily."

Jiang Nan's face was pressed against Shen Bei's neck, feeling slightly cool.

Shen Bei heard Jiang Nan say something as thin as a mosquito: "I'm sorry."

"Stupid." Shen Bei suddenly had a sore nose, and he frowned and cursed, "You're sick in the brain! Take medicine when you're sick, damn it! Doctor!"

He kicked directly into the department and called to the previous doctor: "Quick, this mentally handicapped man cut his wrist, hurry up and bandage him!"

The doctor hurriedly rang the bell to call for the nurse, put Jiang Nan on a stretcher, and pushed her into the emergency treatment room.

Fortunately, Jiang Nan didn't stab her stomach with a knife or cut her throat. She just scratched her wrist with an infusion needle a few times. No surgery is needed, just stitches. So the whole wound was very bad. After the doctor detoxified and sewed up the most important wound, he did some treatment before carefully bandaging it with medical cotton cloth.

It didn't take too long, and Jiang Nan was sent back to the ward.After Shen Bei told the attending doctor about Jiang Nan's bipolar disorder, he called a psychiatrist because of some medication considerations, and gave Jiang Nan a simple test.It turned out that Jiang Nan was not in a very calm mood at this time, so he added some sedatives and antidepressants to the infusion bottle.

The medicine goes in, but it is not to the point of drowsiness, but it can ease the patient's mood.

After the front and back were all done, several hours passed, the doctors were off duty, and the nurses changed for a round.

Shen Bei tucked in Jiang Nan's quilt and looked out the window.

It was too late now, and it started to rain again outside.

The winter here is always so wet, which makes people a little upset.

He looked down at his watch, it was past eleven o'clock.

Shen Bei sighed, walked towards the door, just put his hand on the handle of the door, Jiang Nan suddenly spoke at this moment.

"gone?"

he asks.

Shen Bei closed the door tightly, turned around and said "no"

The two fell into an awkward silence again.

"Shen Bei." Jiang Nan raised his cool eyelids slightly, and his pale pink lips opened and closed slightly, "You know."

Shen Bei: "What."

Jiang Nan: "I love you."

Shen Bei looked at Jiang Nan with a complicated expression, his throat moved, but he still didn't speak.

Jiang Nan stared at him with the deep sadness and mist in his eyes that he always had.

Jiang Nan: "But if you don't love me, why don't you let me die."

Shen Bei was silent for a long time, he couldn't answer this question.

Finally, he moved his lips and said, ambiguously: "You know."

Shen Bei lowered his eyelids, stared at the ground, and said expressionlessly: "You know it all along, why bother to ask."

Jiang Nan closed her eyes.

I couldn't understand his emotions, but Shen Bei guessed that maybe he was a little disappointed.

Gradually, the sound of breathing in the room calmed down, blending into the sound of the rain outside, and suddenly there was a strange sense of tranquility.

Shen Bei leaned against the wall, his body was stiff.

He stood up anyway, opened the door, and walked out of the ward.

Shen Bei didn't bring an umbrella. When he went down, he didn't expect that the driver was still waiting below and didn't leave at all.

Sitting in the well-heated car, Shen Bei felt a bit chilly instead.The driver turned his head and asked him, "Mr. Shen, are you going back to Burberry now?"

Shen Bei shook his head thoughtfully, "No, let's go to Xinshang."

The driver didn't ask anything else, just drove outside.

Shen Bei picked up the phone and called Ying Er.

Eiji answered the phone drowsily: "Hello, little ancestor, what time is it?"

Shen Bei: "It's only past twelve o'clock, when did you go to bed so early?"

Eiji: "Say something quickly."

Shen Bei: "Have you found Huang Ran's background, send it to me, and you go and get Sinuo's phone number from me."

Eiji: "No way, so hard, you don't sleep and others don't rest?"

Shen Bei was not in the mood to chat with him, so he hung up the phone directly.

He closed his eyes and lay down on the seat, but his heart was full of Jiang Nan.

He is so annoying.

So annoying.