Look good

"Yeah." Wen Changrong replied, "To be precise, it was the day I got the medical report."

"Oh……"

"Honestly, before that, I never realized...or thought about what you are to me, how important you are to me."

"..."

"Because we have been together for too long, it has become a habit. Your existence is natural. I won't think about how important this has always been to me. What if one day it doesn't exist? Do it, because I subconsciously feel that it is impossible for you not to be here."

Hearing this, Qiao Xing was a little moved, but Wen Changrong's next sentence was: "So when you filed for divorce, I just thought you were annoying and unreasonable."

"..."

Qiao Xing's hand holding the spoon trembled slightly - he was trying to restrain himself not to let the spoon become a murder weapon.

"I think you've changed, you've become inexplicable, you said you can no longer accept me being with other people, and I thought, haven't we always been like this? Why are you suddenly unhappy?"

"..."

"I've thought about it for a long time and I still can't find the answer. Later, I also thought about which side to choose between you and those wanton copulations. In the end, the answer is no answer, because I want them all, which is just as it should be."

"..."

This is very Wen Changrong.

I can't choose between you and a hookup, because I want both, and it's a matter of course.

Qiao Xing took a deep breath and advised himself to calm down.

"But later, I found a brain tumor in my physical examination. The doctor said that the location of the tumor was not very good. When I saw that question again, everything seemed to have the answer." Wen Changrong said, "If there is only one month left in my life, I just want you."

"..."

"Maybe I'll be crazy enough to set a fire and burn all the Wen family's money, but before that, I want to build a house first and lock you and me together."

"..."

"I will linger with you to the death, and in this last month, I will do everything I have never done and dare not to do. I will leave permanent marks on you, and I will swallow you alive... Or out of reluctance, let you eat me alive."

"Of course," Wen Changrong said, "maybe you won't be able to bear it before this, and you will stab me to death, but I think this death is worth it, at least it is the most ideal way of death I can think of."

"..."

Qiao Xing didn't know what to say.

Wen Changrong's expression was very calm, but there was a secret madness in his words, an unreasonable possessive desire similar to that of a barbarian.

"But then I thought about it, if you do this, you will definitely have psychological problems first, and if I die, who will take care of you? Do you know where to find a suitable psychiatrist? Will it be like many years ago because of Rush to seek medical attention and be tricked into empty pockets."

"..."

Qiao Xing curled his lips and said, "Aren't you contradictory? The bad thing is what you want to do to me. What should I do if I can't make up for it? There's something wrong..."

"Really." Maybe Wen Changrong is also aware of the contradiction between his two paragraphs. The man showed a thoughtful expression, and shook his head after a few seconds and said, "But I really think so. On the one hand, I really want you to be with me. , On the one hand, I am afraid that I will really hurt you."

"……Um."

"Of course, in the end I thought about it for a long time before I realized it was meaningless, because the final tumor test result was benign."

Qiao Xing: "..."

"But the answer to the question I was thinking about before came out." Wen Changrong turned his head to look at him, "At the last moment of my life, I don't want anything, but you are the only thing I can't do. More than anything, you are the most important thing to me."

"I want you to be with me when I'm dead, but I want you even more when I'm alive." Wen Changrong said, "So I thought, although we did spend many years in a multi-person relationship before, you can't accept it now. Yes, I try to change, or understand and accept, it’s not impossible.”

"...Then thank you for the emperor's change of mind!" Qiao Xing stuffed a big spoonful of warm porridge into the man's mouth, "No wonder it was as good to me as taking fake medicine."

"..."

The spoonful of porridge was so big that the man's cheeks swelled up a little. The inconvenient swallowing made Wen Changrong slightly frowned, and it took a few seconds to finish swallowing the porridge in his mouth.

"Qiao Xing."

He suddenly called him.

"Huh?" Qiao Xing scooped up another spoonful of porridge and fed it to the man's mouth.

But this time, Wen Changrong didn't eat, but looked at him for a long time.

"I haven't told you yet. After that, I have thought about our past many times."

"...Well, no."

"sorry."

"..." Qiao Xing paused, his eyes met the man's half-closed gray pupils, "Why did you say this all of a sudden?"

"I'll say it when I think about it." Wen Changrong opened his mouth slightly and took a breath for some reason, before saying again, "Although I did not treat you badly according to the agreement, emotionally...the reason why you can be with me I have been around for so many years, and I am also responsible for my ambiguous attitude."

"I gave you feelings, but failed to respond to your feelings as they should, and failed to protect you well, so... I'm sorry."

"..."

Qiao Xing didn't speak.

His heart was slightly touched, and he had mixed feelings about it.

Since the two divorced, Wen Changrong had apologized to him too many times, but Qiao Xing was never really touched by him.

Qiao Xing couldn't tell exactly what was different this time, but his feelings were indeed different.

His eyes met those smoky gray pupils, and he saw his face clearly reflected in the gray pupils, his eyes were peaceful and peaceful, as if he had seen these eyes somewhere before, they were very familiar.

That's right, he has looked at him like this thousands of times, his eyes are focused and hide a kind of tenderness that is not easy to see. The reason why Qiao Xing liked Wen Changrong at first was simply because of this kind of eyes, and those subtle but extraordinarily important considerations. .

I met him at the age of 18, and we are still together at the age of 26. This is eight years, when the teenagers grow up, and the adults are baptized as smooth by the world.

During this relationship, they pulled each other and rubbed each other to soothe their wounds. Now everything has changed, but it seems that nothing has changed.

"Okay," Qiao Xing said, and put the cold porridge bowl on the bedside table.

He stretched out his hand and grabbed Wen Changrong's hand, "You talk a lot today, and your words are extremely emotional, why... why are your hands so hot?"

Qiao Xing swallowed the wetness in his eyes, and belatedly realized that the man's complexion was abnormally red.

He was too busy to say anything, he just reached out his hand to caress the man's forehead in a hurry, but he felt a scorching temperature in his hand.

"Why didn't you say you had a fever?!" Qiao Xing was angry.

"Is there?" Wen Changrong on the bed looked blank, as if he hadn't noticed it at all.

……

After the doctor came, he took Wen Changrong's temperature again, and it was 39°C. He really had a fever.

This temperature is not high, but ordinary people must be aware of it. The reason why men don't feel it is probably because they burned too much a few days ago, so that they don't feel it now.

The doctors and nurses hastily checked Wen Changrong's temperature, and Qiao Xing was circling outside the ward in a hurry.

The doctor said before that the postoperative fever will only last for 2-3 days, and this is the fourth day. Qiao Xing always felt that Wen Changrong's abnormal words just now seemed to mean the last words in the TV series, and he was afraid that Wen Changrong would have a second fever Announcing the infection directly burps.

Hiccups are of course not hiccups. Under Qiao Xing’s anxious circling, the man’s fever subsided in less than an hour. Later, the doctor explained to Qiao Xing that talking too much might be the cause of the fever. After all, he was sick—— They will all become emotional, and it is easy to say things that they would not normally say.

In short, it has nothing to do with death or not.

Qiao Xing was a little relieved, and then quietly observed Wen Changrong for two days, and saw that the man had indeed no fever anymore, so he was completely relieved.

Peace of mind is peace of mind, but Wen Changrong's rare words attracted the attention of the psychiatrist. After the fever subsided, Wen Changrong's attending physician came to Qiao Xing to ask about the conversation between the two that day.

Qiao Xing naturally said everything, but when Wen Changrong mentioned the "ideal way of death" and other topics about death, the psychiatrist suddenly became very nervous, and then opened a meeting, and gave Wen Changrong two hours of psychological counseling in the evening.

Qiao Xing remained in a dazed state, and was called into the doctor's office after Wen Changrong's psychological counseling was over.

The doctor probably asked him to give Wen Changrong more positive psychological hints, if he could praise Wen Changrong more, if he couldn't, just talk about sweet memories and so on.

After all, in bipolar disorder, when you are manic, you hurt others, and when you are depressed, you hurt yourself.

Relatively speaking, there are more ways to control mania, such as sedatives, force, or isolating patients, while depression is not easy to control.

After all, depression can be hidden, it can be tied, but it can't be tied for a lifetime.

Wen Changrong's mother also received this 'order', and the two came out of the office with solemn expressions.

Because the doctor said that patients with depression are very sensitive, you can't say things like 'son, you can't die, mother still depends on you', because it will put pressure on the patient, 'you will get better soon, and the company is waiting for you Inheritance, the Wen family can't do without you' can't be said, it will still put pressure on the patient.

And words like "My husband, you are so handsome, get well soon and fuck me" can't be said. The patient will think that his physical condition is not good at this time, and he will feel even more inferior.

You can't say this, you can't say that, Qiao Xing feels... This is really embarrassing me, Qiao Xiaoxing.

Although Wen Changrong's mother loves her son very much, she is also a strict mother type. It is difficult to praise Wen Changrong, but for Qiao Xing, if he is asked to praise Wen Changrong, he can only subconsciously think of such points as how handsome he is and how tall he is.

But according to what the doctor said, that can't be said.

In fact, Qiao Xing thought that Wen Changrong should not be so fragile, but following the doctor's advice, he still took a notebook and wrote about Wen Changrong's kindness to him, um...and sweet memories.

Qiao Xing wrote about how the man helped him in his career, woke up his younger brother to write about it, and wrote about solving problems for him without saying a word... After that, you peeled shrimp and I ate meat in a small town, and Chinese-style weddings. The mandarin duck was caught by the long kiss and lingering love between the two...

Qiao Xing was shocked when he finished writing.

He looked at the densely packed two pages and fell into thought.

Qiao Xing actually wrote something like this a long time ago.

But at that time, he wrote about Wen Changrong's shortcomings on one page and Wen Changrong's advantages on the other.

He wrote about Wen Changrong's shortcomings for about two pages, but his advantages...seems to be only three.

He is handsome and rich.

Gone.

Why so many this time.

Qiao Xing looked at the densely packed handwriting on the notebook, and suddenly realized that he had a strange problem.

When he was with Wen Changrong, most of his memories were torture, and he dreamed that he was really happy about the divorce. After the divorce, he thought of many sweet pasts uncharacteristically, and felt sorry for the divorce too soon.

The same is true now.

Write two pages for disadvantages when they are not separated, and two pages for advantages when they are separated.

What, is there something wrong?He also lost it before he knew how to cherish it?

Pooh.

Qiao Xing stood there thinking for a long time, and suddenly realized.

It's not that Wen Changrong's benefits and sweetness don't exist when they are together, but that when they are together, he never dares to think about the good side of a man.

Yes, it's not that I can't remember, it's not that it doesn't exist, but I dare not think about it.

Like a fish drinking water, it knows whether it is warm or cold.

Aside from career, in terms of relationship, Wen Changrong is probably a complete garbage in the eyes of outsiders, with nothing but money and face.

But Qiao Xing himself knew that the reason why he jumped at him with moths, and the reason why he pretended to smile to deceive himself that he would stay by his side for so many years was not for his face, let alone his money, but because Those sweetness and thoughtfulness were all experienced by him personally, and it was precisely because of those sweetness and thoughtfulness that he fell into this.

He didn't dare to think about him, dared not recall the sweetness of the past, he was afraid that if he thought of the slightest thing, his hard-hearted heart would soften again.

He has to think badly of him, ignore the good things he has done to him, and reject all his good sides before he has the courage to leave him.

And now...it seems unnecessary.

"Hey." Qiao Xing looked at his handwriting and sighed. He felt that he hadn't written for a long time, and the handwriting was getting uglier.

"Mr. Wen," Qiao Xing walked back with the notebook in his arms, "I wrote a lot of words to treat your illness. I usually sign 3000 yuan per sign. There are so many words in this book, you can figure it out..."