Jonson's Diary

On April 2018, 4, the rain turned sunny

An Huai cleaned the house he rented very neatly, and he helped me pack my luggage.In fact, there is nothing to clean up, mainly medicine.

I plan to go back today, Kunming is a nice place, but I still want to go back.

I want to go back for no reason.

Not only Xue Lin, but more because all my memories come from this.

Unfortunately, An Huai did not come with me. He said that he happened to accept a job in Kunming.

Li Keji was with me, and his brother urged him to go home.Every time I see Li Keji calling and being nagged by his family for an hour or two, I laugh at him, but in fact, I envy him.

But I'm not doing too badly now.

No, it should be said that I have been doing well, from the past to the present.My parents died early, and I have very little memory of them. Sometimes my grandma would talk about my parents, nostalgic and happy.

Xue Lin is not at home, he does not know that I am coming back today.

The house is very messy. There are a bunch of takeaway boxes and dozens of beers on the coffee table. The milk in the refrigerator is still the same as the day I left, and the dishes are also the same as the day I left.

The empty room was filled with a dark atmosphere.

I took a lot of effort to clean it.

Occasionally I would do something stupid, like washing the dishes, and I forgot to wash the dishcloth first, so it kept getting dirty, and the same thing happened countless times in different parts of the house.Mopping the floor, not wringing out the mop, turned out to be dirtier.

But in the end, I managed to get it done.I feel that my mobility has increased a lot, um, compare my heart for myself?

In the hospital, the doctor will make us move our bodies regularly, which is a bit like radio gymnastics, or, in fact, radio gymnastics.

But I don't know how to do it at all. Even if I can, I may not be able to follow the standard. I can only raise my hand and shake it casually.

But I was also over-excited. When I was doing radio gymnastics like chicken blood, I was a little embarrassed when I thought about it.It's a miracle the doctor has put up with me for so long.

Radio gymnastics, in a sense, is a symbol of the student era.From elementary school to high school, who hasn't secretly used the excuse of going to the toilet to escape radio gymnastics?

Xue Rin is more independent, fled openly and aboveboard, and was scolded by the teacher every day, but he just smiled like this.I thought while doing radio gymnastics in a proper manner: Sorry, I can really do whatever I want with good grades.

Of course, this sentence is still a bit watery, Xue Lin is just a skin, he likes to skip class, oh, he also likes to fight, think about it carefully, in fact, he still does whatever he wants.

Pity me, I have to be crazy with him, and I have to bear the death ray fired by the teacher.

It's early morning, and Xue Rin hasn't come back yet, so I wonder if I should call him?But if he is busy, will he find me annoying?It would be even worse if he fell asleep in a hotel or something like that, Xue Lin has a very serious waking up qi and cannot be messed with.

I suddenly heard the sound of turning the key, I turned my head, and finally came back.

When I saw people, my brain went blank for a long time. It was hard to describe what it was like. If I had to describe it, it was like a paralysis of the nervous system, unable to get rid of it, unable to move.

"Long time no see," he said with a smile, "Xue Lin has been at the company recently, my rent is due and I can't find a suitable house, so Xue Lin let me live here temporarily."

Perhaps, the nervous system is really paralyzed, and I still greet Wen Huibo with an indifferent face.

I remembered what he said before, can I regret it now?

Can I regret it?Just this time, I want to live well, can I fight for it?

In the end, I temporarily ran to Li Keji's secret base. Li Keji gave me the key to that room.

"If you feel like you have nowhere to go, run away here," he said.

"Here you will not have any troubles. This is your own world. If you are unhappy, you can let the flowers wither. If you are happy, there will be stars twinkling. These are all under your control."

I was lying in bed thinking:

Why me?Why am I sick?I'm not a bad person, if there is a god, is he kidding me?But this joke is neither funny nor funny.

Maybe God is just a group of bastards who are willing to see the pain in the world!

If only I wasn't sick, I could play with Xiaosong every day and grow up with him until death do us part.

I can also work hard for my career. I am so busy that I can't stand overtime, so I ask my colleagues to make a bunch of fans and complain about the boss.

Facing Xue Rin, I wouldn't be so unconfident.

I should be happy. After I die, he will have a gentle person to accompany him through his life as I planned before.

Obviously everything is as planned before, why the more I follow my script, the more sad and reluctant I am?

It shouldn't be like this.

If only, if only I wasn't sick.

If only I got better soon.

It would be great if it really gets better, that's impossible, after all, there are nine out of ten unsatisfactory things in life.

I think my ghostly appearance may be more than nine out of ten.When did I become like this, complaining about my own life, shouldn’t life be fought for by myself?

In this world, there are 60 billion people, and there are too many people who are less fortunate than me. What right do I have to complain?

But, I really, really worked hard.

Reason and sensibility, joy and pain, I am in the middle, and my soul is torn by them.

I know, I know sometimes my thoughts are too negative and too optimistic, I know it, but I can't control it, I can't control myself.

It occurred to me that I saw a sentence before, it seemed to be science fiction, I can't remember it.

Godisdying - God is dying.

What I'm tempted to say is, go|die!Best to explode the world!Nothing left!

2018.4.8

bother

2018.4.9

I don't want to take medicine I don't want to take medicine I don't want to take medicine I don't want to take medicine I don't want to take medicine

2018.4.10

Why am I still not well?Why are you still not well?I need to get better soon, I've wasted too much time.

You must get well soon!will be snatched!Me, Li Keji, Xiao Song, An Huai, grandma and Xue Lin will all be taken away.

Can not be done!I'm a selfish guy and I want them to stay with me.If I am with them too, will they not leave?

Not

Because you are crazy!They can't stand you, they will definitely go, they will abandon you.

So how about I ditch them first?

But I can't bear it.

Will I get better faster if I take all the medicine?

Seriously, can you wait for me?I'm almost done, really!