Being-Towards-Death

Some people are born out of tune with the people around them, and they are most likely to be excluded. Fatty Zhang is one of them.It has been half a month since I entered the detention center. Every day, I am either subjected to routine interrogation or blatantly bullied by the inmates who sleep on a bunk. They seem to have reached a tacit understanding with the guards. As long as no one is killed, they will turn a blind eye.

Fatty Zhang swallowed his anger at the beginning, but he didn’t expect them to get worse. He was stripped of his pants and taken away before dinner three days in a row——Fatty Zhang is fat and can eat. He couldn’t take it anymore for three consecutive days. .

As early as when he was first arrested, he explained the ins and outs of those pills clearly, but the detention center did not intend to let him out.Seeing the "comrades" who committed the same crime as him, but came in later than him, appearing on the stage like a revolving lantern, the hungry Fatty Zhang suddenly realized: Someone is fucking him, and he greeted the detention center and refused to let him go. go out!

He has a small social circle, and he can count the people he knows with one hand; after thinking about it, only Liu Mian, Qian Youdao, Shi Guyuan and his group don't like him.Fatty Zhang said relentlessly: His brother died because of Shi Guyuan!Didn't the little money he lost in the casino go back to Shi Guyuan's pocket in the end, so he deserves to be tortured to death!

After another beating, Fatty Zhang's hatred reached its peak.At dinner that day, he lost his pants again, but this time he fought back. He first pissed on the pillows and quilts of those scumbags, then knocked on the door and called the guards, asking to see by name Song Weibin of the Criminal Police Detachment of the City Bureau.

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Early in the morning, the Criminal Police Detachment of the City Bureau received a fax from the Jiangbei City Public Security Bureau. They recently received a report that a real estate developer accidentally found four rotting corpses who had been shot and died while developing land in the western suburbs; The cross-comparison of the missing persons in the whole city coincides with the disappearance time of the family of four of the owner of Naner Hotel.Further identity matching is currently underway.

This greatly inspired the team members, and they held a meeting to study the detailed photos on the fax, hoping to find new clues.In the evening of the meeting, the phone rang again. It was an inside line from the city detention center, saying that a prisoner claimed to have evidence of a large number of smugglers, but the prisoner asked to see Captain Song Weibin before he would speak.

After listening carefully, a female team member said, "If the evidence is convincing, this will be a major case that shakes Taoxian's economy. Maybe Xu Liwei's case and last year's Zhang Jingshen case are just the tip of the iceberg. Team Song, do you think we should Do you want to ask your boss first?"

Song Weibin hadn't modified his face for a few days, his beard was full of stubble, and his expression was vicissitudes; in the battle between emotions and legal principles in his flesh, the young man who was originally as vigorous as green mountains and green waters seemed to have experienced vicissitudes in just a few months, leaving only scars .

Seeing that he didn't say anything, Qin Ming said, "Well, Team Song, you go to the detention center first, and we'll wait for the autopsy results to come out, without any delay."

Song Weibin silently grabbed his coat, pointed to the two team members, and went to the detention center together.

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Xu Ping came to the gate of Tengkong, and hesitated for about ten minutes; the weather in the north was already bleak in autumn, she put on light makeup, dressed in a decent and elegant but thin professional attire, and stepped on a pair of high-heeled shoes that she had no chance to wear in the power plant. Shivering in the cold wind.

Song Weibin is idealistic, so she has to be down-to-earth, watching her son grow up, not to mention the tuition fee, nutrition fee, and the cost of giving gifts to teachers in front of her eyes, just say that in the blink of an eye, marriage and birth will happen in the blink of an eye. Son, the husband's family must at least prepare a new house, otherwise the daughter-in-law's family will look down on them. This generation is an only child, girls are as precious as boys, who will live with you if you don't have a house?

Xu Ping has never been poor in her life, and the power plant pays well, which is not a matter of her father's words;Her father is just such a baby bump like her, and he can't wait to arrange for her to be put into the coffin.After entering the power plant and getting his job done, her father's heart was settled, and Zhang Luo retired.Who knows that there is a follow-up in life!In the past two years, the iron rice bowl has turned into water in a bamboo basket. State-owned enterprises have laid off workers, laid off workers, and laid off workers. No one can remember that Xu Ping was taken care of by her superiors back then!With the last shiver, she was still shaken off.

She rubbed her arms and looked around. The shops on the street were all hung with banners saying "welcome the new century"—yes, it's the new century, and Xu Ping thought to herself that every new thing that is popular should be available immediately. Don't go, new ones won't come, Song Weibin loves whatever, it's best to die, she can't let Xiaohan be inferior to others because of her family background!

She straightened her newly made curly hair in front of the small makeup mirror, reapplied her lipstick, went upstairs to the front desk, and told the receptionist to look for Mr. Shi; the receptionist knew her, but her image was completely different from before. His eyes became ambiguous, and he said, "Boss Shi is not here, do you have anything to do?"

"Ah, he's not here," Xu Ping said disappointedly, "Then do you know when he will come back?"

The little girl laughed and said, "How do we know the boss's itinerary, why don't you call him directly."

Xu Ping said, "There's no rush, I'll wait on the sofa, you guys are busy with your work, don't worry about me."

The little girl stopped her: "Hey - Shi is always on a business trip, maybe for a few days, it's useless for you to wait here."

"Ah, what's the matter?" Xu Ping asked back. The courage she had mustered up for several days began to waver, and she repeated the question hesitantly, "Then how many days will he be away on business? Just give me an approximate number."

The little girl had never seen such a pestering visitor, she was a little anxious, and said angrily: "You asked me who I asked, President Shi didn't say, where do I know?"

The young man who was on duty with her tugged at her, and the little girl just bowed her head and ignored her; Xu Ping wouldn't care about a girl in her twenties, neither staying nor leaving; Liu Mian came out; seeing Xu Ping, he went up to meet Xu Ping in surprise and joy, and said, "Hey, aren't these younger brothers and sisters? Why are you standing here, go up and sit down."

Xu Ping and Liu Mian took advantage of Shi Guyuan's face to meet each other, but they were not familiar with each other; when they were about to decline, Liu Mian said, "Mr. Shi told me that you come. If he's not here, you can just talk to me if you have anything to do." I said yes, that," he called the young man at the reception, "you go to the door and tell the driver, let him wait a while, I will come down later."

Xu Ping said embarrassingly: "You see, if you have something to do, you can take care of it. I'll go back first. I'll come back when Mr. Shi comes back..."

"Then don't tell you to make this trip for nothing," Liu Mian said, "I dare not disobey Mr. Shi's order. Let's go upstairs. It just so happens that Xiaochu has been in town for the past two days. I sent several large boxes of imported cherries, each of which was so big and sweet, but the child didn’t like to eat it, so I threw away several boxes. When I left, I asked someone to move two boxes for your house—— Hey, why are you being polite, for children, you say you..."

Liu Mian and Shi Guyuan have experienced strong winds and waves, and have been on the same boat so far, becoming the second helm, they are naturally good at trying to figure out Shi Guyuan's mind.Teng Kong is on the cusp of the crisis, and wants to turn the tide, both the positive and the negative, and the bad and the bad have to be dealt with; Xu Ping is Song Weibin's wife, and with her in his hands, if one day turns his face ruthlessly, he can be a trump card that makes Song Weibin afraid .

Xu Ping refused, but followed Liu Mian up awkwardly; after Shi Guyuan left, Zheng Zhichu seemed to have been enlightened, grinning and crying with Shi Guyuan one day, but the next day he was a young and promising son of a family; He breathed a sigh of relief, they are all ancestors, the family is at odds, but he is the one who is not human inside and out, and now Mr. Zheng is hardworking and studious, and he will be easy to explain when Mr. Shi comes back.

Zheng Zhichu is struggling with all kinds of contracts, proposals, and reports in the sea of ​​books and papers; he clearly sees that Shi Guyuan handles these things with ease, but in his hands, he has become a big monster in the game; Zheng Zhichu Holding his breath, he refused to admit defeat, and didn't want to ask Liu Mian to guide him. He felt ashamed, so he looked up the book word by word by himself.

But Liu Mian, who hadn't left for a while, came back with Xu Ping, and Zheng Zhichu, who wanted to be quiet, was so annoyed that he didn't say hello, ignored Xu Ping, and said to Liu Mian with a gloomy face, "Aren't you leaving? What's the matter?"

Liu Mian was neither angry nor annoyed, showing his trademark amiable and rich smile, and said, "Xiao Chu, your sister-in-law Xu Ping came today and was taken care of by Mr. Shi; now that you are the boss, it's the same with you."

"Can it be the same?" Zheng Zhichu said reluctantly, but felt much more at ease in his heart, because of the sentence "It's the same with you", as if he was on an equal footing with Shi Guyuan, "Speak up, I'm busy."

Xu Ping was so embarrassed that she had no place to rest her hands and feet. She lowered her eyebrows and begged a mean junior. It was not within the scope of her mental preparations, but for her son, she curled her fingers and said with a stiff smile: "That's it, Earlier, Brother Shi said that there might be a position that is more suitable for me here. I just finished my work and my child is in school, so I wanted to come and see Brother Shi. I didn’t know he was on a business trip..."

The truth of the "business trip" was the source of Zheng Zhichu's irritability. He was suddenly stepped on sorely and blatantly. Zheng Zhichu's face was so dark that he was not prepared. There are tens of thousands of Taoxians who support Taoxian, and many of them rely on connections to make a living; I don’t know which position our President Shi will leave for you? If it is too popular, it will be scheduled for the next year.”

"Xiao Chu! How are you talking!"

Zheng Zhichu's eyes widened, and he put on airs: "What to say, no one can specialize in the introduction, do you understand business affairs! Don't you make an appointment with Director Wang at noon? What should you do? Wait for you, wait for the small talk behind your back, what you said is that we are vacated!"

Liu Mian was angry, but she didn't like to be angry; Xu Ping looked around and realized that Zheng Zhichu didn't want to see her when she said what she said—one was laid off and would rather go to the east of the city to work as a cleaner than risk being caught next to her home. The dangers encountered by former colleagues "give in" to a light-hearted woman. She is willing to bow her head, which is the greatest love for her son, but it does not mean that she is ready to "be humiliated".Moreover, Shi Guyuan had to make a final decision on whether or not she was hired.

Thinking of this, she said, "I'm not in a hurry, brother Liu, I'll come back another day."

Liu Mian was ashamed, embarrassed to stay any longer, and rushed to see it off; Zheng Zhichu was arrogant, but actually very guilty, for fear that Xu Ping would sue Shi Guyuan; Calling Shi Guyuan, the same cold female voice said: "The number you dialed is not in the service area..."

"Damn it," Zheng Zhichu thought wistfully, "Which valley did he go to? Don't even know if he's sold out!"

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Shi Guyuan bid farewell to the fishing village early the next morning and headed for Takasaki City.He took away the book of Yesenin's poems and put it in his backpack, but he didn't dare to read it again.

He originally planned to take the night flight back to Taoxian City, but he heard that Master Dele had recently come to Pufa Temple to teach Buddhism.When you meet an old acquaintance in a foreign country, forget it if you don’t know it. If you know it, there is no reason not to pay a visit.So on the second day, Shi Guyuan went up to Pufa Mountain together with the swarming believers. After the Fa lecture, he went to the abbot's room in the back mountain for a happy meeting.

Dele lived in the guest room, which was elegant and quiet. He was very happy to see Shi Guyuan, and went to the dining hall with him to eat vegetarian food, and had tea and chatted after returning to the room.

Dele said: "I haven't seen you for a while, the benefactor Shi is a bit haggard."

Shi Guyuan smiled and said, "When one gets old, one's spirits fail."

"Will you please tell me?"

Shi Guyuan's eyes were hazy and foggy. In the past, his eyes were deep and deep, and he could not see the bottom. This time, he couldn't see in.

Shi Guyuan stared at the floating and sinking tea leaves in the yellow soup for a while, then smiled at Dele and said, "Master, if I become a monk, will the Buddha accept it?"

Dele said: "The karma is not over yet, and it is fake to become a monk. You are deceiving yourself and others."

Shi Guyuan laughed at himself and said: "This sentence hits the nail on the head, and it hurts my heart. Sometimes I really envy you monks, all the love and love things go around you."

Dele said: "Buddhism talks about rebirth and becoming a Buddha, but when we lose, we should still be in pain. To put it bluntly, we are also human beings. There are also verses about love in Buddhism, but the love of Buddhism is great love. The love for all living beings is not just for one person. This kind of love is not unconditional. The so-called forming a good relationship is ultimately for oneself, for becoming a Buddha, and for the blessings of the next life."

Shi Guyuan murmured: "Life passes too fast, and all my wishes are pinned on the next life. I don't want to have another life... You say people live forever, what are you trying to do?"

De Le said, "Amitabha Buddha", and said: "From love comes sorrow, from love comes fear. If you are away from the beloved, you will have neither worry nor fear."

Shi Guyuan shook his head and said with a smile: "It's too late for you to say this, it would be better if you said it earlier. It would be nice to be free from worries and fears."

Dele looked at Shi Guyuan's wrist, the bodhi son he gave him, and said: "No, no worries, no fears, no human beings, peace and joy are the best. No worries and no fears, how can you realize what peace is? What is joy? Just like getting rid of suffering and obtaining happiness, only suffering can bring happiness.”

Shi Guyuan said, "Then am I free from suffering now?"

Dele's reply was very explosive: "Can you leave?"

Shi Guyuan was speechless.

In the silence, Dele refilled him with tea and said, "Tomorrow there will be a Dharma meeting in Pufa Temple. Since we are destined to catch up, we might as well listen to it before leaving."

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The cruelty of this chapter was not uncommon at the end of the 20th century, but fortunately everything is in the past.