My general

Am I dead?The bar owner opened his eyes in a daze, and saw a tall figure standing in front of him with a cigarette butt in his mouth. He sat up excitedly, but found that he was still in the ward of the Shuizhou General Hospital.In front of me was a woman in a white coat, biting the cap of her pen, impatiently tapping the plastic medical record book with a blue-black fountain pen, making an irritable "da da" sound, the loose white coat made her look much bigger than she actually was ——This is Tian Luna, the attending physician of the outpatient and emergency department of Shuizhou General Hospital.

"Oh, I'm awake." Another man in a white coat was also standing at the head of the bed. When he saw the bar owner opened his eyes, he came over with a playful smile. The white coat was a military uniform.The bar owner knew him, the captain of the military doctor of the Seventeenth Regiment.

Seeing the layers of gauze on his wrist, the bar owner only felt sad: "Why did you save me?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa... You don't think you are treating the meritorious bonus as a death pension, and plan to die in love?" The military medical captain laughed tremblingly, "What kind of shit luck did that guy have? You are such a baby."

That's a merit bonus, not a death benefit?Quartermaster still alive?The bar owner himself is dying.Fate is cruel.The bar owner looked at Dr. Tian: "Doctor, how long can I live?"

"How long to live?" Dr. Tian stopped the pen in his hand, and the eyes behind the crystal lens were sharper than a scalpel, which made the bar owner startled. To test my suturing skills, trying to die in my hands to ruin my reputation..." With a "snap", the plastic fountain pen in her hand was cut in half, "Don't worry, don't say die, even your wrists will be back to the same size as before Same."

The bar owner noticed the faint dark circles under Dr. Tian's eyes, and swallowed: "Didn't I have an incurable disease?"

"Incurable disease?" Dr. Tian's face became even more sneering, "You mean syphilis, which was cured hundreds of years ago?"

"It's just syphilis?" The bar owner was dumbfounded. "Yesterday I felt pain all over my body and felt nauseous."

"Hmm, this is called 'Ji Hai reaction'." Dr. Tian nodded, and threw the broken fountain pen and the cap in his mouth into the trash can, "When you were brought here, I saw that you had a hard chancre. Two more items were added to your test. The test result is the same as I guessed, the early stage of syphilis. The person who sent you said that he didn't know you had syphilis at all. I guess you haven't been treated outside, so I will deal with it together. Syphilis Fever, headache, arthralgia, nausea, vomiting, exacerbation of syphilis, etc. may occur within a few hours after the first medication, and the symptoms will usually be relieved within 24 hours. Originally, you only need to be hospitalized for 24 hours of observation, and you will be given some medicine after discharge. Regular outpatient reexamination is fine, but you did it for me.” Dr. Tian grabbed the bar owner’s injured wrist, although he did not use any force, but made the bar owner break out in a cold sweat, “You are really capable, relying on an infusion The needle pierced blood vessels, nerves, and fascia, causing me to sew you all night yesterday. In order to ensure the recovery of your wrist function, you will have to be hospitalized for at least a week, and you will have to be followed up for half a year after discharge. What do you think of me? Very free, isn't it?"

"With such a small symptom, you think it is an incurable disease. You don't suspect that your nausea and vomiting are pregnancy?" The captain of the military doctor laughed so hard that he couldn't straighten up. It's gone."

Quartermaster still alive?Was his own discomfort just syphilis?The bar owner couldn't react for a while.

"Don't think that syphilis is a minor disease. Fortunately, it was discovered early." The captain of the military doctor continued to tease him, "Did you know? When syphilis is at an advanced stage, it will rot from JJ to testicles. It will never grow back..."

"In the late stage of syphilis, there will be mental symptoms and nonsense." Dr. Tian mercilessly exposed the lie of the military doctor captain, and at the same time took out a pen from the chest of the little nurse passing by, and hit the chest.

The little nurse screamed, seeing that it was Dr. Tian, ​​she covered her chest and pouted.

"After I leave the night shift later, I will take you to eat cake, the one you have always wanted to go to." Dr. Tian stroked the little nurse's chin with a pen, making her giggle, then opened the medical record book and continued to write. He continued to talk to the captain of the military doctor, "I think you're already showing advanced symptoms, you bloody gay, do you want to go for a check-up too?"

"Hey," the captain of the military doctor slapped the bedstead dissatisfiedly, "You..."

Dr. Tian looked at him over his glasses.

Without looking directly through the lens, her eyes are even more frightening.With Dr. Ueda's eyes as sharp as a scalpel, the captain of the military doctor was frightened and kept silent.

"So fierce, can't you get married?" Dr. Tian pushed his glasses, "The last person who said this to me was smashed in the head with a wine bottle, and then he was sentenced to [-] imperial yuan by the court for sexist remarks. A fine, plus three weeks of compulsory labor, to go to the Blue Cross Hospital next door to bathe cats and dogs and shovel their excrement every day. It may be a good idea to send you there, and you can give them injections.”

The face of the captain of the military doctor turned green.

Another little nurse came over pushing the treatment cart.

"Forget it. Asking you to treat cats and dogs is considered animal cruelty. In order to prevent innocent animals from dying in your hands, I will have a lot of adults, and I will not sue you for sex discrimination in court." Dr. Tian wrote the medical records. Hand it over to the little nurse, "Honey, the 6th bed will be transferred to the surgery department for a handover shift. Also, find two male nurses and take this guy to the treatment room for an enema to prepare his skin. I suspect he also has syphilis." Said Finally pinched the little nurse's buttocks. "Go."

"Hey..." The captain of the military doctor shrank back, "You're not serious, are you?"

"What do you think?" Dr. Tian took out the examination gloves from the treatment cart and put them on, and made a "snap" sound, and two tall male nurses immediately supported the captain of the military doctor, one on the left and one on the right, "If he resists, give him a hand Inject morphine, according to the military dose."

The two male nurses responded and dragged the military doctor captain to leave.

"No, wait!" Doctor Tian suddenly stopped them.

The military doctor captain thought he had a chance, but he didn't expect that Dr. Tian's next words would be: "Don't waste morphine, he probably has already given him resistance to the drug. If he doesn't cooperate, just give him an enema with chloral hydrate."

Seeing the captain of the military doctor being dragged away, the bar owner thought Dr. Tian should leave too, but unexpectedly she bent down to him: "When you go to the surgery, remember to ask your family to bring you a fruit knife."

"Should I eat more fruit during the recovery period?" The bar owner shrank back.

"No, I think the director of surgery is a little upset, I suggest you go to the surgery and use a fruit knife to commit suicide." Doctor Tian grabbed the other wrist of the bar owner, "Remember, when cutting your wrist, don't cut it horizontally like in TV dramas. Cut vertically like this, the incision must be long. Of course, if you cut the neck hard enough, the effect will be better. The carotid artery is here and here, and the blood can soar to the ceiling when the knife is cut down."

The people hiding outside couldn't listen anymore.

Seeing the quartermaster, the bar owner seemed like a lifetime away: "You're back?" Was he worried about him?Haggard like this.

"Master, why are you beating me? How do I know that the master will treat the bonus as a pension?" The chef followed behind with his head in his arms, with a look of injustice on his face, "You are afraid that the master will feel guilty if he knows that you have contracted syphilis from him. When you come back, you asked me to keep it a secret, and the master misunderstood me, is it my fault?"

He has spoken out!The quartermaster glared at him fiercely.

The head chef quickly covered his mouth with both hands.

Smoking is not allowed in the hospital.Seeing the quartermaster with a thermometer in his mouth, the nurses beside him were all snickering.

The bar owner couldn't help being a little funny: "How long will you stay this time?"

"I'm not leaving." The quartermaster put his arms around the bar owner, "Forever."

"Loyalty depends on whether you wear a watch or not." Dr. Tian was indifferent to the sweet scene of the reunion, "Next time, can I trouble you to flirt in a way that won't increase my workload, such as sending flowers or something—of course, If you have hay fever, ignore me."

"Dr. Tian, ​​thank you, thank you, thank you..." The head chef hurriedly sent Dr. Tian out because he was afraid that she would spoil the scenery. "Well, doctor, what should I pay attention to after I leave the hospital? For example, diet."

"Eat more fruits and vegetables, avoid greasy and spicy, no smoking and alcohol, including second-hand smoke."

"Doctor Tian is really good and kind, I don't even know how to thank you." The head chef sent a lot of free compliments, for fear that she would spoil the scenery between master and master.

Dr. Tian didn't even lift his eyes: "If you really want to thank me, let those two syphilis guys explode the surgeon's chrysanthemum and make him contract syphilis. I will pay for it myself and pay a lot of money."

"Didn't it mean that syphilis is not difficult to cure?" The head chef was puzzled.

"It's not difficult to cure." Dr. Tian showed a creepy smile, "I just want his partner to think that he's messing around outside, and then I can watch a good show."

Another nurse ran to the door of the ward and peeked in, covered her mouth and walked away with a smirk. She said something to a few other nurses at the nurse's desk, and then laughed together.

Dr. Tian looked at the little nurses trembling with laughter, sighed, and took out an unopened tongue depressor from his pocket to the head chef: "It's disposable, just throw it away after use. "

"This is?" the head chef didn't understand.

Dr. Tian looked helplessly at the quartermaster who was leaning against the bar owner with a thermometer in his mouth, and said, "Don't let that guy walk around the hospital with an anal thermometer in his mouth, affecting the work of nurses."

Enemies outside the story should be knotted rather than resolved (Doctor Tian)