I exchange my innocence for ten years for your constant companion

Why should love be so humble?Why is it so "cheap"?

I've done everything I can, and I've given you everything I can, and I almost dug out my heart and gave it to you.

Maybe I gave it, maybe someone else can give it to you.Even if I dig a heart for you, give it to you, and give it to you, but would you care about it?Would you like it?

I'm so useless!I can't give you anything.So there is no way to impress you.So there is no way for you to understand what I mean.

Maybe I shouldn't have this kind of thought in the first place, maybe I shouldn't have liked you in the first place.After all we're gay, you're straight, and you have a girlfriend.But like this kind of thing, this kind of feeling, I can't control it, I tried it, I really can't control it.

Maybe I was wrong.Maybe this is what I deserve—Zhu Gusheng!Maybe I shouldn't believe in things in this world, and I shouldn't believe that men and women will have good results.Maybe I should have cut off my love and my heart.

I don't have the strength to like and love, so I just want to spend the rest of my life with you, and I will end up with bad results - I am still a passerby!I was just passing by.In the end, what should have become the scenery passed away.

I thought I would be able to persist until graduation, but I really can't take it anymore, it's really hard!Then please allow me to stop being so nice to you.Anyway, for you, there is no difference, you still have your girlfriend. (What else do I have? What else?)

Maybe your response to me has not been what I want.Perhaps what we both reply to each other is not what the other party wants.Maybe you really gave me your best, but that's not what I want.What I want, you really can't give me.

So, I want to let go, I can't take it anymore, I am really not good now, I don't have the strength and ability to impress you.Maybe you don't need me to impress you, after all, you have your girlfriend!How can I do... I can't do this kind of thing.

Boyfriend, girlfriend, the intimate one I want in my heart, maybe I will never find it.These things may really be hard to come by.All I can do is to make myself good enough.Because the current me, whether it is to attract others to chase me, or to chase others, is not qualified!They are all unqualified!

Perhaps, it should be, doomed to die alone.However, instead of finding someone casually, it is better to die alone, or end this life early!

Why not be alone forever, I still have a book as a companion, at least it will never leave me.

It is really difficult, tiring, and bitter to go through this life, but if you don't experience it, you will never know what it is like.

Marriage is already very difficult, which means that you have to work hard and be very capable.Because I don't want to find someone to make do with for the rest of my life.

If it is the same sex, it will be a mountain of swords and fires, with countless thorns, and you need to become better yourself!More able to withstand the storm!

What I wanted was never sex.What I want is someone who fits my soul.At least you can know the cold and the hot, you can love me and pet me, you can ask me how warm I am, and you can stand with me at dusk.

Although there are not only poems and distant places in this world, but also troubles, but I don't want to make do with the rest of my life.

So I have to work harder!

- 2018.2.181:07

From the second day of the new year to the third day of the new year, after crying, remember.