Siheyuan: A Cook in the 60s

My name is Lou Xiaoe.

My father was known as "Half City of Lou" before liberation.

With the title of "the daughter of Loubancheng", my childhood can be said to be happy.

Maybe it's happiness.

Since I was a child, my mother told me that the Lou family gave me a stable and wealthy living environment, and for this, I also need to be responsible for it.

I don't understand what this sentence means.

Until later.

I have a little raccoon and I love it very much.

It likes me very much too. It follows me around every day, rubbing its body against my ankles, and its voice is very pleasant to hear.

The fur on its body is soft and feels very reassuring.

But not long after I raised him, my father came over.

Tell me that you are not allowed to keep it anymore.

I do not understand why.

My father did not answer my question, but just looked at my mother and left.

After my father passed away, my mother got angry with me for the first time.

I was still young at that time and didn’t understand what this meant, let alone why it was for.

That night, I was scolded and my mother punished me by not allowing me to eat. I lay on the bed, feeling indescribably uncomfortable. I had a premonition that my cat slave was going to die.

The next day, I really couldn't see my cat slave anymore.

My mother didn't give me an explanation, but took me to the entrance of the alley.

She pointed to a skinny kid who was just skin and bones and told me that if I didn't want to be like him, I had to be obedient.

He took me to the Eight Great Hutongs again, and watched the men and women coming in and out, and told me that if I didn't want to be like them, I had to be obedient.

I asked her what it meant to be obedient.

She said that listening to my father is obedience. Everything in the house was brought by my father. He can take it away at any time. My father gave us the confidence to live and live well. We should listen to my father.

She told me that if I gained something, I would lose something, unless I took my cat to the street to keep the kid company.

I was naturally unwilling to do so. I knew that child, or rather, I probably knew all the children on this street. I had talked to them. They were just alive. They didn't even know when they would die. Compared to this, the raccoon slave didn't seem that important.

At that time, I seemed to understand one thing, that there seemed to be no essential difference between my mother and me.

Time passes day by day.

Later, the owner of Sijiu City changed.

The aunt took her son out and heard from the mother that this was a decision made by the father and the environment did not allow them to stay. If they stayed, they didn't know what would happen.

As for why my father stayed, my mother didn't say, but I roughly understood what he was thinking. He wanted to give it a try, and it is always better to provide help in times of need than to add icing on the cake.

No matter what the father was thinking.

My mother did not leave the city, so my father naturally let her move in with us.

It’s a bit funny to say, but after we moved in, the relationship between my father and mother quickly heated up. Within a few months, they became inseparable, and I became my father’s only and most beloved daughter.

Later, things did not develop in the direction my father expected.

He became more and more anxious, and he abandoned more and more things. The first people he abandoned were those people in the south of the city. I knew they were his thugs. The second thing he abandoned was most of his business. He donated many things, and he had more and more free time.

I don’t know if it’s because he has nothing to do or he’s just too bored, but he likes my mother more.

And the third person he left behind was me.

I had expected this.

This has to do with my mother.

What kind of person is mother?

She was very smart and was born in the Tan family. Although the Tan family fell into decline, she had read a lot of books. She told me that people always have to choose what kind of life to live. She wanted to live a good life, so she chose my father.

Tan’s cuisine itself is a symbol of status, and my father married her to complement her heritage.

As long as she doesn't act up or make a fuss, she can live a happy life.

She knows clearly what she has to pay and what she can get.

As her daughter, I naturally know what I should do.

To be honest, I don't care, I'm even looking forward to it.

Because I think that with my wisdom, I can definitely help my future husband live a good life, and live a wonderful life. I haven't married yet, but I have already started to fantasize about the future.

However, real life dealt me ​​a heavy blow.

I found that I couldn't communicate or interact with others.

I wanted to tell him what to do, and told him by citing classics that this was a historical conclusion and that we should not do this. But in the end, I just got the answer that "the dross should be swept into the trash".

It's funny. When I told him the essence of China's 5,000 years of history, he refuted me by simply using a sentence he saw in the newspaper: "The dross should be swept into the trash."

I am not convinced.

I think I can convince him.

It was not until that day when someone came to tell me that he had slept with a woman in the countryside that I suddenly remembered what my mother had said.

clever?

Oh, so what if you are smart? You can't survive in this world just by being smart. And, you think you are smart, so what you see must be true? I tell you, what you see is not necessarily true. Only the facts are the facts, and what you think is always what you think. Be careful, be cautious, and don't be arrogant.

From that moment on, I understood.

Perhaps, this matter itself does not have much meaning.

I was at a loss, as if I had lost my goal.

During this period of time, I felt that I was alive, just alive. I ate and slept every day, never went out of the house, and I didn't know what I was doing. I was in a daze.

Cao Wei once told me that once this person has free time.

The mind will start to wander uncontrollably.

I thought a lot.

I thought about my mother's words and the love between my father and mother.

Suddenly a question popped up in my mind: What is love?

Does love really exist?

What are the so-called romance and love at first sight?

To be honest, I read a lot of descriptions about love in books. Later, my father didn't let me read these books and most of them were destroyed, but those descriptions always lingered in my mind.

Later, I thought about why I was thinking about love.

Perhaps my rationality can no longer withstand the torture of reality, and I can only ponder the love that has no answer.

Yes, only love can be figured out.

At this time, the man appeared.