The last elf

"Everyone eats it while it's hot. Everyone is free to eat. Anyway, someone is offering half price.. biqugev"

As soon as the dishes were served, these beasts ate and drank like reincarnations of starving ghosts. They almost chewed the plates. I was so scared that I didn't dare to move my chopsticks. Especially when it comes to drinking, one becomes more violent than the other, even the old women, clinking their glasses one by one, just trying to get the male compatriots to bow to them, without the slightest bit of restraint that girls should have. Anyway, none of them are ladies. Speaking of which, how can a woman who has been arm wrestling with boys since elementary school be so reserved?

Anyway, it was very uncomfortable for me to be among these African refugees. I couldn't win against them when I ate and drank, and I ate the least at the end of the meal, but I still had to pay half of the money. Why? Is it because I'm late? If I had known earlier, it would be better to let them take off their pants, a bunch of beasts...

"What's wrong? I have a dead look on my face." Vixen Yang obviously noticed that I didn't look good, so she poked me with her arm and asked.

"It's nothing, my stomach hurts." I said, holding my stomach.

"Stomach pain? I think you have kidney deficiency? Honestly, how many girls have you killed?" Shrew Yang sneered and asked me after drinking the wine in her glass.

Wow, how come these old ladies can say everything? What's more, it's such a hidden word, why did it pop out of her mouth as soon as she said it? It seems that her man has suffered a lot, maybe he is being treated like a grandson by her all day long.

As the saying goes, every family has sutras that are difficult to recite, and Shrew Yang naturally belongs to the "Diamond Sutra" type, the tyrant among the sutras. I don't think her man will want to be romantic and happy in this life. Just this "Diamond Sutra" "That's enough for him to read. It seems that dating is risky and you need to be cautious when getting married. I'm really right. Fortunately, my Xueying and Rongrong are gentle and virtuous people. Otherwise, I would have been single for the rest of my life." .

When I think of the Diamond Sutra, I think of the one that Liang Banxian sold me. Speaking of which, I haven't touched it for a long time, and I haven't used the Diamond Sutra for a long time. I can't remember the formulas, including the locks and "Diamond Sutra". "Cloud Step" I haven't touched these two treasures since I came out of the detention center. It seems that I need to review them again after I go back. After all, they are also the ancestral martial arts secrets of the Liang family. If they are wasted in my hands When Liang Daxian and Liang Banxian find out, they will beat me to death.

I shook my head, picked up a glass of juice on the table and drank it in one gulp. Yang Shrew saw me and patted me and said, "Hey! Is it vitiligo? This is my son's cup!"

I took a look and it was true. Anyway, your son is not sick, so just drink it. He didn’t even say anything. Why are you yelling like a mother-in-law?

After a while, Vixen Yang pushed the little cub in her arms onto me and said, "Hold me for a while while I go to the bathroom. If you dare to bully him while I'm away, I won't be done with you."

After Vixen Yang left, I stared at the little cub in my hand and thought: Today it finally fell into my hands. Come on, your mother bullied me for so many days when she was in elementary school and even treated me like a beast. She deserved this. How to calculate?

I didn’t expect that little kid to smile at me. This made me angry. Little kid, don’t think that I won’t dare to beat you because you are so many heads shorter than me. Believe it or not, I will prevent you from seeing the sun tomorrow. ?

He smiled and stopped laughing, then frowned and looked like he was about to cry. Just when I was wondering what this kid wanted to do, I suddenly felt a heat on my thigh. When I looked down, this kid actually peed. .

Haha, are you scared to pee? Now you know how good I am, brother, right? Hey, wait a minute... Damn it, mother-in-law! ! ! Ah, wait a minute... Mother Ni, I'm so scared... I'll go to Mother Ni! ! ! Peed all over my pants! I just bought new pants yesterday! ! !

Damn it, this time it’s all over. This is the first time I’ve met you, you stubborn brat, and you gave me such a greeting gift. Okay, kid, I’ll remember you. When you grow up a little, I’ll beat you to death.

After Shrew Yang came back from the bathroom, I pointed to the puddle of water on my pants and said to her, "Your son peed on my pants. What should I do with this?"

What to calculate? Just forget it! How else can we calculate it? I can't beat her again and again, but if she gets angry, it will be my turn to pee my pants.

Shrew Yang was stunned for a while, then said with a smile: "This means that my son likes you. Most people are too lazy to pee!"

Congratulations to you uncle! Do you still have someone who likes people like this? Then if I pee on you and then say I like you, will you accept it?

But thinking about it, I could only get into the toilet dejectedly and take toilet paper and wipe it on my pants for a while, but there were still marks on my pants. Although it was dried, anyone who was not blind could see it.

By the time I returned to the dinner table, the beasts had almost finished eating and drinking, and their faces were getting redder and redder, as if they had been punched.

"You've had enough fun, haven't you? We've had enough fun, let's move out, right? This place only provides food but not accommodation. If we don't go home, your parents will come looking for me!"

Fortunately, I finally coaxed these dozens of beasts out of the hotel with some persuasive talk. When I went to the cashier to pay, it was more than three thousand yuan.

"Hey! We agreed that I'll pay half and you'll pay half, one thousand and five, who's coming?" After I said that, I turned back and glanced at them, and saw that all the grandchildren were standing outside the hotel with their heads turned. , obviously they had heard what I just said, but no one came in to pay.

Grass mud horse! When ordering, everyone acted like a gentleman and only picked the expensive ones. Now when it's their turn to pay, everyone acted like a coward. A bunch of stubborn people...

I greeted their whole family in my heart and shook my head. Oh, come on, who will make your life miserable? Just think that the five or six years of friendship between these classmates were used to feed animals.

When I paid the money and walked out of the hotel, I saw that several of my friends had vomited under the big tree at the door. What was even worse was that a few of them were standing on the side of the road doing Tai Chi, shaking their hands and feet. The posture looks like the legendary Sleeping King's Eight Fists. They are really heartless, and they are not afraid of a car driving over and hitting me to death. How come I have lived with this group of weird classmates for so many years? I really admire myself.

I smiled bitterly, stepped forward and pulled them back and said: "Masters, fathers, dear fathers!!! Don't wander around, okay? I'll take you to enjoy the breeze. When you wake up from the wine, we can go back to our homes." !”

After that, I led my grandson and granddaughter, who were about fifty, and started swinging on the street. But who knew that something happened after a short while?

"Niu...there is a girl..." One of the drunk guys pointed at a girl under the streetlight in front of us and said to us. After saying that, he staggered towards the girl.

I took a closer look and saw that the girl was about the same age as us. She was wearing black clothes and standing under the street light in front of her. She seemed to be waiting for the bus.

"Hey! Don't go! Don't scare people! We have more than or girls here, which one can you choose? Be careful they beat you!" I shouted at the guy's back, but he didn't seem to listen. , stunned and walked towards the girl with his paws open.

Okay, let's take a look. Anyway, this guy can't wake up if he's drunk now. If he gets slapped by that woman later, he might wake up. Thinking of this, I stood there with my hands on my hips and waited to watch the show.

"Little... girl! Give me a... kiss!" The guy staggered up to the girl, and then put a hand... probably a paw on the girl's shoulder. Then he put his mouth towards the girl's face.

There is a good show to watch...

Sure enough, the guy flew out in less than two seconds, but the girl didn't slap him away, but took two steps back and kicked the guy in the face.

I saw that guy fell to the ground, and I quickly ran forward and tried to help him up, but his weight of more than kilograms couldn't cover him. He was so heavy. I only weighed just kilograms. How could I help him up? Can you afford him? What's more, he is still a drunk person. Even if he is finally helped up, he will wilt down on his own.

"Kiss...I'm here! It tastes so...so good!" I saw the guy lying on the ground with his eyes closed and giggling. Not to mention how sexy he was, and his expression was full of enjoyment.

"Okay, uncle! You've been kicked so hard that your nose bleeds, but you still taste good? Brother! You are really my brother! You're kissing the soles of someone else's shoes!"

I was slapping that guy's face with my hand when I suddenly felt a sharp pain in my back, and then I threw myself forward.

This made me grin in pain. When I got up from the ground, I saw the girl staring at me with a cold look.

It's over, she must have thought that I was that buddy's accomplice, and she must have thought that I was also a pervert.

"Then... Beauty, please listen to my explanation! I..." Before I could finish my words, she raised her foot and kicked me again with a fierce look in her eyes.

I immediately crossed my arms to block. Although I was not kicked over, I was still kicked back several steps by her. Why is this girl so strong? !

"Beauty, you misunderstood! I am not an accomplice, nor a pervert, I just..." Before I could finish my words, she kicked me again.

I’ll fuck your second uncle! Are you still being unreasonable? ! At best, I am just a soy sauce and peacemaker. Do you need to deal with it together? good! If you don't want to listen to my explanation, then wait until I knock you down and then slowly explain it to you!

Thinking of this, I started to fuck her with a fierce look in my eyes, but after more than ten rounds, this girl was not at a disadvantage at all. On the contrary, she hit her harder and harder. After a few consecutive kicks, I was kicked to the ground by her.

Damn...why is this girl so fierce? ! Did he take medicine? ?

Just as I was sitting on the ground looking at her in a daze, I suddenly discovered that a lot of Qi was condensing on her body, like countless flames surrounding her.

I’ve seen this really angry! Just when I went to Liju Mountain with Hu Shuirong last time, Yu Xi also had this kind of energy gathered in her body when she transformed into a purple dragon, but Yu Xi's was purple and hers was black.

There is actually real energy surrounding her body... So this girl is not from the human race! Because among the five major tribes of divine dragons, spirit demons, and humans, only the human tribe has no true energy, and even the demon tribe has it. So which tribe does this little girl belong to? Are they friends or foes?

Seeing the black energy on that girl's body getting thicker and thicker, I suddenly thought of the Black Wind Demon. Wasn't the true energy on the Black Wind Demon's body black at that time? What's more, none of the people from other clans have black Qi, at least none that I've seen. So does that mean this girl is from the Demon clan? But wasn't the demon clan jointly eliminated by the four major clans of Shenlonglingren some time ago?

At this time, my mind was in chaos, and the dozens of elementary school students in the distance also felt that things were not that simple, so they all came over to me.

"Don't come over! Just stand where you are and don't move!!!"

I yelled at them, and they froze on the spot.

At this time, the girl in front of me is approaching me step by step. To be honest, I am really afraid of her now, because I can't beat her! ! !

what to do? what to do! She'll kill us all if she keeps this up!

I glanced at my drunk friend who was lying on the ground, and thought to myself, your real father is really good at causing trouble. No matter who you mess with, you messed with someone who is not a human being! What do you want me to do now?

It is said that when a person is in a critical moment, his desire to survive is extremely strong. Just when the girl walked up to me, a life-saving method suddenly popped into my mind. Although this method is very shameless, it is indeed a hundred thousand things. Trial Bailing, of course, the premise is that it is only effective for girls...

I don’t care! ! !

I gritted my teeth and used the "lazy donkey roll" move to roll past the girl. Then I rolled to the side of the drunk guy and said to the girl: "Don't come over here! If you come over again, I'll use my ultimate move!" "

She sneered and walked towards me again without any fear. She must have thought I was scaring her.

But I'm sorry, she doesn't know that I really have a big move, but this big move requires the sacrifice of the buddy next to me.

Brother, for the safety of all of us, I'm sorry...

Seeing that the girl had already walked in front of me, I quickly reached out and took off the belt of the buddy who was lying next to me, then grabbed his pants and pulled them down hard.

Suddenly, a pair of bright red underwear that the guy was wearing was exposed.

Damn it, this is your animal year, buddy? These bright red underwear are so festive...

When the girl saw this scene, she immediately froze on the spot.

"If you come over again, I will continue to pull off the remaining pair!" After I said that, I was ready to continue pulling on his strong red underwear.

When the girl saw it, she immediately covered her eyes and turned around a few times, climbed over the opposite wall, and then disappeared.

Seeing the girl running away, I took a deep breath and lay down on the ground. This was the first time in my life that my uncle was almost killed by a woman.

But fortunately she is a girl. If she were a boy...

After a while, the guy wearing red pants woke up. After he woke up, he lifted up his pants and asked, "Why am I sleeping on the street? Who took off my pants?"

I really admire Brother Xiqing. He didn’t die after being kicked by the girl just now, and he even fell asleep while lying on the ground. As expected, what Teacher Song Dandan said is true: “Heartless people have poor sleep quality. high."

"It's nothing. You were drunk just now and you forced me to show you how domineering those brand-name red pants you were wearing. I couldn't stop you no matter what. In the end, I really couldn't help you until you took off your clothes. A pair of underwear will knock you out when you continue to take them off.”

"Oh, thank you so much, buddy." He scratched his head and said to me.

Thank me? I, he, have to thank you! Without your red underwear, we would all have to hang out tonight. Although I am also wearing underwear, I will never do such a thing like exposing my underwear in front of a girl, even though I had sex with Awei and Xueying not long ago. Yuxi and the others have also appeared in front of them once or twice, but that was all when I was unprepared, okay? What's more, I won't wear red pants, because the color is too dazzling!

(End of this chapter)