Across the Water Margin: Officials of Ximen

"Official~person~official~person~"

"Scattered flowers gradually become attractive to the eyes, and Asakusa has no horseshoes."

"Official~people...official~people..."

"It's not that I prefer chrysanthemums among flowers, it's even more flowerless"

"...official...people...official...people..."

"The tide of the Spring River is even with the sea level, and the bright moon on the sea is tidal."

"…………"

"If you want to cross the Yellow River Bingsaichuan, you will climb the snow-covered mountains in Taihang."

".........?"

"The tide comes in the middle of the night, and the lonely boat rises under the moon."

".........!"

"On the first day of the censer, the waterfall sprayed into a rainbow"

"!!!!!!!!!"

Ximen Qing threw his pen on the ground, and looked at Li Jiaojiao, who was limp in a ball, contentedly.What "Su Huang Mi Cai" Song four, Su Dongpo, Huang Tingjian, Mi Fu, Cai Jing these four old guys are known as the best calligraphers in the Song Dynasty.May I ask, can these four dry old men write such vigorous calligraphy as my senior official Ximen?Hehehe~ I, Ximen Daguan, is the number one "calligrapher" in the Song Dynasty!

Ximen Qing was elegant at home all night, and after two days of hard work, Pan Jinlian also ushered in the day of Wu Dalang's funeral.

Early in the morning, the fire family arranged by the head of the regiment He Jiushu came to Wu Dalang's house to carry the coffin.Wang Po naturally came to accompany Pan Jinlian, and neighbors such as Yao Wenqing, Hu Zhengqing and Zhao Zhongming also came to see her off.

Pan Jinlian put on her filial piety and covered her face with her sleeves along the way, pretending to cry for Wu Dalang, the breadwinner.

In Lion Street Lane, Uncle He Jiushu, the leader of the regiment, was also called up by his wife early in the morning, and asked him to pretend to go to the funeral while Wu Dalang was cremated.Uncle He tidied things up and followed his plan.

Pan Jinlian and his party crossed the streets and alleys, left Yanggu County, and came to the human transformation field outside the city.Pan Jinlian and Wang Po didn't delay, so they taught them to burn them with fire.He Jiushu, who had been hiding aside for a long time, came to the field with a stack of paper money in his hand.

Wang Po and Pan Jinlian met and said, "Ninth Uncle, I'm so happy that your body is fine."

He Jiushu said: "The villain bought Dalang a cage and made cakes the day before yesterday. He never got the money back, so he specially burned the money with Dalang."

Wang Po said: "Uncle Jiu is so sincere!"

Then Uncle He burned the paper money, so he gathered it up and burned the coffin.

Wang Po and Pan Jinlian thanked: "It's rare that Uncle He Jiu saves up, so I'll thank you when I get home."

Uncle He Jiu said: "The villain just has a fever everywhere, the lady and the godmother are at ease, and go to treat the neighbors and neighbors in the dining hall. The villain here will take care of you."

When Pan Jinlian and Wang Po heard what Uncle He said, they thanked Uncle He, turned around and walked away.But the old lady was stealing He Jiushu all the way.

Seeing Pan Jinlian and Wang Po walking away, Uncle He used a torch to pinch the fire away, picked two bones and dipped them in the bone pool to see that the bones were crisp and black.Uncle He put the two bones away, and he also came to the dining hall to make peace.After a while, the coffin passed by, the fire was killed, the bones were cleaned up, and they were buried in the pond.

After everything was over, the neighbors dispersed with Wang Po and Pan Jinlian, and Uncle He also left.

Wang Po looked at He Jiushu's back and said to Pan Jinlian: "This old villain is indeed a fraud! He is not a high-ranking official, and he is in danger of being deceived by him. If he wants to go to Wu Er to lick his ass and act good, this old thief must live like a high-ranking official." That pass!"

Chapter 9 Officials are really living gods

Uncle He stole Wu Dalang's bones, said goodbye to Pan Jinlian and Wang Po, and hurried home without delay.Seeing that they came to the outside of Shizi Street and the door of the house, they suddenly heard Ximen Qing's voice again: "Uncle Jiu, let me find it easily! Please take a step to talk."

It turned out that after Ximen Qing got up today, he figured that Uncle He should go to steal Wu Dalang's bones, so he came to the alley of Lion Street to wait for Uncle He!

Uncle He Jiu groaned repeatedly in his heart. It was like meeting a tiger when he went up the mountain, and a dragon when he went down the water. He was afraid of what would happen!I have acted so meticulously, without any flaws, why did Ximen Qing come here?

With a smile on his face, Uncle He greeted Ximen Qing, sang a fat song and said, "Hello, senior official! How can a villain get such a big blessing that day, dare to ask a senior official to come and find him? What does a senior official have to pay? It’s what a person brings to a villain, how dare a villain disobey his orders?”

Ximen Qing pointed to the hotel at the alley and said, "Uncle Nine, come and have a few cents of wine with me. I have a problem that needs to be solved by you." After finishing speaking, Ximen Qing walked to the hotel at the alley and sat down, and asked the drinker to go first. Bring two cents of wine.

Uncle He was apprehensive, his legs trembled, and he said: "I dare not be a villain", and followed Ximen Qing into the hotel like a puppet on a string.

"Uncle Jiu, please sit down." Ximen Qing pointed to the opposite bench.

"What kind of person is a villain? How do you deserve this? I don't know what's the matter with a high official?" Cold sweat broke out on He Jiushu's forehead, and he sat down helplessly and guilty.

"Wine, please!" Ximen Qing asked the wine measurer to sift the wine, and he and Uncle He ate several glasses in a row.Uncle He Jiu was terrified, fidgeting and drinking with Ximen Qing.

Ximen Qing finished a glass of wine and asked, "Uncle Nine is familiar with the people in Yanggu County, who is the number one hero?"

He Jiushu came to his mind, but how can I answer it?He Jiushu said vaguely: "Here, in the streets and alleys, the villain often hears people say that Wu Song who beat the tiger in Jingyanggang can be called a hero. The villain, the villain doesn't know Wu Song, and he doesn't know him. I don't have much knowledge, so I really don't know if Wu Song is really a hero. The villain is just hearsay, I don't know what the big officials think?"

Ximen Qing laughed and said, "That Wu Er killed an animal by chance, but he was just a somewhat reckless villager, how can he be a hero? Uncle Nine, do you know that there are still immortals in this world who spread beans into soldiers and call wind and rain Art? You have to learn a little bit of fairy art and have the ability to be unpredictable before you can be called a true hero."

He Jiushu sighed: "The high officials are right, but the villain's knowledge is too shallow. It's a pity that such a fairy-like figure, how can the villain have the luck to meet him?"

Ximen Qing put down his wine glass, asked the drinker to step back, took out a stack of talisman papers from his arms, handed it to Uncle He, and said to Uncle He, "Uncle Jiu doesn't know, but I went to Mount Tai to learn Taoism and learned some fairy arts. Last night I set up an altar to practice the technique of prophecy, and got these fairy talismans. The records on the talismans are unbelievable. Could it be that my fairy art has not been completed? Therefore, I was very troubled last night, and today I specially put these fairy talismans The talisman brought Uncle Jiu a look. I heard that Uncle Jiu is well-informed, maybe he can answer my doubts for me?"

"Grand officials think highly of villains." He Jiushu bowed and took the talisman papers, unfolding them one by one on the table.

He Jiushu didn't read the talisman papers, but it was fine. When he saw the words on the talisman papers, his face turned pale with shock, his tongue was tied up, and he couldn't speak. He just felt that a basin of ice water had been poured on his head , was frozen to the core.

"Don't be frightened, Uncle Jiu, please look carefully." Ximen Qing smiled mysteriously, thinking to you old thief, let you experience my great prophecy!Uncle Ximen comes out to play with some ghostly things casually, let's see if you, an ignorant bumpkin in the feudal era, are not afraid?

Then Uncle He Jiu was not only afraid, but also so scared that his complexion turned pale and his soul flew away!I saw that those talisman papers wrote in detail how he cheated at Wu Dalang's house, and how he secretly discussed with his wife to steal the bones after returning home, and kept them as witnesses.Even today, I went to the Huarenchang to steal Wu Dalang's bones, and the two bones are now on my body. They are all written clearly and exactly.

What does it mean to predict things like a god, this is to predict things like a god!Not a god, who can have such great supernatural powers?It's ridiculous that I still dare to show off in front of the officials of Ximen. Isn't this the old birthday star who eats arsenic and is tired of life?If the official Ximen wanted to take his humble life, wouldn't it be like crushing a flea to death?They all blamed the stupid woman at home for urging me to fight against the officials of Ximen.Now it's hard to hate high officials and people!

Uncle He Jiu's face was pale, and his two sides were fighting. How could he sit peacefully on the bench?As soon as his body softened, he slid from the bench to the ground.

Then Uncle He rolled and crawled to the knees in front of Ximen Qing, fell down on the ground, hugged Ximen Qing's calf with both hands, and cried bitterly for mercy.

Ximenqing pretended to be surprised and said, "Why is Uncle Jiu like this? Please get up quickly, don't make outsiders laugh."

Uncle He Jiu didn't know that Ximen Qing was playing tricks on him. He straightened up and knelt in front of Ximen Qing, slapped his own ears with both hands, and scolded himself.

Seeing that Uncle He Jiu felt quite remorseful, Ximenqing should have completely surrendered, and he was really afraid of himself.It's not interesting to watch this farce any longer, at least keep a little face with him.

Ximen Qing stood up, kicked Uncle He Jiu, and said, "It was a waste of me to treat you to a glass of good wine that day, but you made it so ugly! Get up with me soon, I have something to tell you. You take my The fairy talisman has been put away, and one is indispensable!" After speaking, Ximen Qing left the hotel first, and asked the restaurant to pay the bill at his house.

Uncle He Jiu got up from the ground in a hurry as if he had been pardoned, folded the fairy talismans on the wine table one by one, held them respectfully in his hands, and followed Ximen Qing to leave the hotel.

Ximen Qing took Uncle He Jiu to a secluded place in the alley, stopped, and asked sharply, "He Jiu, are you convicted? Now, do you still dare to go against my will?"

Uncle He Jiu said with a flustered face: "You are a living Bodhisattva and a living god in the sky! This villain has been insane for the past two days, and I will never dare to do it again in the future. I also pray that the high officials will forgive your sins and forgive the little one!" The lives of the man and my crazy woman! Don’t worry, the high officials, the villain will throw those two rotten bones on the street to feed the wild dogs."

"He Jiu, I will give you another chance to serve me. If you still dare to lie to me in the future, I will not forgive you lightly. I will use the Wulei Tianxin Dafa to kill your family! Listen to me, Take the remains of Wu Dalang back and hide them. There is no need to destroy them at this time. After Wu Erlang returns, I will tell you how to proceed. Do you understand this matter? Don’t go out on business again!” Ximen Qing was unpredictable. said.

"The villain saves it! The villain saves it! Thank you for not killing me! A high official is a living god in the sky. A villain can win the favor of a high official and serve a living god. It is a blessing that a villain has cultivated in his previous life! "He Jiushu replied respectfully.