63 – After Action-9
“…Calm down for now. Let’s talk about something else. It’s been such a long time since we met, so there’s no need to get angry at each other.”
I forced Adrian to calm down.
“After you left, what happened?”
“…No big deal. I was just talking about you.”
“Me?”
No matter how you think about it, talking about me in Selam wasn’t very wise.
“It wouldn’t be fun. In the first place, you don’t like sword fighting or anything, do you?”
I know very well what kind of mentality the men of Selam have.
At best, my story will be seen as a man’s struggle for survival after being kicked out of Selam.
You would have despised me. Since they were people who lived that kind of life in the first place, I had no intention of criticizing them.
“Why?”
“You… Showed me life outside of Selam. The life of someone who was driven out of Selam without women, whom others feared so much.”
Surprisingly, it seems that there were not many public opinion criticizing me.
“Fortunately… There were many people who, knowingly or unknowingly, thought me okay. People who couldn’t help me to notice Logan.”
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“Well, it deserves it.”
If it were me, Adrian is not the kind of person to be resentful of.
“But why?”
“After that, it’s just as I said. I spread your story.”
Adrian and I didn’t talk much. Most of the time, I was the one listening.
“What story?”
“It’s just a thought you usually had.”
Adrian smiled bitterly.
“I don’t know anything else, but the position of the woman you meet determines the status of a man. The saying that you are really happy being locked up in Selam without doing anything… There was something that touched people’s hearts. There.”
It wasn’t such a grandiose statement, but it seemed like it could be accepted that way.
“I’m glad.”
Well, I didn’t expect much. If the sense of privilege they have is even a little faded, it will be helpful to society in its own way.
“A man who has not met a woman yet, or a man who thinks that a woman is shunning her… And a man who can’t get rid of the woman because of her insecurities even in that situation, sympathize with my story.”
“…It could be.”
“Thanks to that, I was able to secure my position within Selam on my own.”
Adrian shakes the empty bottle, realizes that it is empty, and frowns.
I thought that I wouldn’t touch such cheap alcohol first, but it seemed so cramped that I couldn’t stand it unless I drank something.
“It’s kind of funny. You were kicked out of Selam for saying that to me, but I stole your teachings and found a place with them.”
“Well, it would be nice if it was helpful. Besides, if I said something like that, no one would have listened?”
I cannot understand the men of Selam. They can’t understand me either.
The reason why they listened to Adrian must be because of Adrian’s usual behavior.
Even in the midst of being criticized and despised because of Logan, he doesn’t get angry with others and is kind to people like me who first entered Selam.
Even if they say the same thing, there is a difference in depth between an outsider who speaks kindly and an insider who speaks softly and kindly and who has enough trust.
“But…”
“That’s true, well.”
In the first place, it was Adrian who listened to me. And what he said will be very different from what I said.
I had no intention of claiming the copyright of my thoughts now. I’m not going to patent the sun.
“Anyway… It looks like you’re living well. I’m glad.”
“I told you. It’s not me, Evan, you’re the problem. Why are you just enduring that kind of treatment?”
“I am satisfied.”
“You are not alone in your problem. You are like a beacon to others.”
“Me?”
Eyes wide, I asked Adrian back.
“Besides you, there are people who have a desire to leave Selam. They want to take on the challenge like everyone else and show that a man can live confidently without a woman.”
“…”
“There are people who say they don’t want to be a bird in a cage or a flower in a vase. You are like a lighthouse to them.”
“Are there many people who think that way?”
“Not a little.”
It seemed that I had created a sort of sect without my knowledge.
It liberates the existence of men who are subordinated to women and allows men to stand proudly alone…
‘Oh, this is a bit dangerous.’
It’s not easy. Things may not be as good as you think.
However, it wasn’t that I couldn’t understand his heart. Would have been anxious
The fact that there is someone living like me might come as a bit of a shock to the men of Selam.
“By the way, people who hate us are laughing at you. If you come out like that, they say you’ll only be forced to be beaten by other women, they say it’s just selling yourself for free…”
“It’s not like that, you know that.”
“Sure, I trust you. Of course I don’t think so. But, other people don’t.”
Adrian looked at me with worried eyes.
“I’m undermining you. I’m scaring people who agree with you.”
“It’s pointless.”
However, I am not living to become a revolutionary.
It’s just that men get preferential treatment, it’s a bit unreasonable, but since there are so few men, it’s unavoidable and you can pass it on.
I can’t admit it, but I have no intention of blaming the men who admit it. Because everyone has their own life.
“Still, at least you can be treated safely. If you go that far…”
“Let’s stop worrying about safety.
“It’s not only that. Women are targeting your body. From now on… Be more careful.”
“In the end, I was the one who left Selam on my own feet. Well, after all, you could say it wasn’t intentional, but…”
Still, it was I who caused the violence. Rather than not being able to endure Logan’s provocation, it was more that he thought that he would be dragged out together when the number of cases was caught.
“…When I first heard that you had moved out of Selam, I thought only good things would come.”
“This is good enough.”
“No, no man in Selam… Not even a man who came out at all would be treated like this. Seriously, a man who committed murder and was put in a men’s prison would be more comfortable than this.”
Well, I thought that would be the case. If you had to confine a man in a world like this, it would have been a much more comfortable place than an ordinary prison.
“It’s okay to ask for more. That way more people will gain courage and live a happy life even when they go out…”
“I’m sorry that it seems like something is going on.”
I scratched my head.
“It’s just, you don’t have to come out there.”
I just don’t like it when others get involved in my life.
Daisy’s thoughts were misunderstood. It seemed that not all of Selam’s men had a unified opinion, but from Adrian’s words, they did not protest because they were afraid of the ‘value of men’ falling.
I am afraid that I will live an unhappy life. They are afraid that those outside of Selam will not be able to live as happy lives as they think.
Whatever the men of Selam did after seeing my actions, it was none of my business. No matter what kind of life they live.
“That… What do you mean?”
Adrian looked at me with disbelief eyes.
“You hated those people too. Ranked according to which woman you met, fighting each other… You thought that was disgusting.”
“Honestly, I can’t say I didn’t have that feeling. But, I never really wanted other people to act like me.”
Just don’t run in my eyes. I don’t have to force myself to live that kind of life.
“You, no. What do they want? To eat the food they used to eat in Selam, receive the security guards they used to receive in Selam, lie on the same bed they slept in Selam, and enjoy happiness without the woman alone?”
You are looking at life lightly. It’s not what I’m saying.
“You know me, no matter how I look, I’m causing a lot of trouble to the people around me.”
“That’s…”
“A class is created for me, and while other gladiators use hooks or clubs instead of swords to receive a set of protective equipment, I fight wearing armor all over the body so as not to bleed.”
Of course, Ballum wasn’t a class just for me. From next year, any woman will be able to take that class.
However, the fact that it was a class tailored for me was an unchanging fact.
“I don’t use a public bathhouse, but I use a separate attendant to fill up the bath water for me. There is an accommodation for me, and there are still people who get nervous when they see me.”
Of course, I didn’t get it for free. Because the money I bring to the Colosseum will be greater than the benefits I receive.
Even so, I couldn’t say that I entered the Colosseum fairly and squarely, competing with ‘ordinary women’.
If there were people who feared that even the treatment I received was ‘too poor’, I couldn’t even imagine what those people would come out and talk about.
“Still, to be honest… People out there might want the man to just stick to Selam.”
If you don’t make eye contact, there’s nothing to be jealous of.
Just leave in your head the fact that such people exist somewhere in the Empire, and ignore them as ‘people from another world’.
“People who want to get out of Selam, don’t they just want to run away?”
At my words, Adrian hardened his complexion.
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