Am I A God?

Translator: Sparrow Translations Editor: Sparrow Translations

With the end of Muscle Society, Zhao Yao had returned to his usual mundane life. He would spend his time running between the cafe's daily operations and settling some errands inside the extradimensional belly. It was a simple yet fun time.

At the end of the month, Matcha sneakily entered the cat toilet.

"Hmph, today will be the day I am crowned as the star cat for the cafe! As long as I retain my title, I'll be able to enter the belly and meet Diana. Then, I would finally propose to her!"

"Meowhaha, if she gives birth to a male cat, I'll name him MaTigreal. If it's a female cat, she'll be MaFreya."

Both names were extremely lame. It was simply a combination of Matcha's name with his favorite Mobile Legends character. However, just the thought of it caused him to beam from ear to ear. He was already on cloud nine.

If Zhao Yao were around, he would definitely remind Matcha how unrealistic his plan was. Firstly, he had to win the competition. Secondly and more importantly, why would Diana even marry him?

Matcha swept his eyes furtively around to check if anyone was looking at him. With no prying eyes observing him, Matcha instantly activated timefreeze. A sly smile was plastered on his face as he stopped right in front of an automatic self-cleaning litter box. He reached his arm into the litter box and was digging for something.

His paw made contact with a clump of soft objects which instantaneously sent jitters down his spine. His forehead creased together as agony flashed across his eyes.

"Matcha, you must hang in there. Diana will be yours as long as you win the competition."

Matcha bit his lips and continued fishing his paws through the litter box. Finally, he removed his paw from it and saw his entire paw coated in a black grime. He inched his nose towards his paws and broke out into a shriek as he threw his paw away.

Despite the unbearable stench, Matcha began cackling, "I will definitely be the crowned as the star cat!"

His eyes swept across the cat toilet furtively again. After ensuring that the coast was clear, he activated timefreeze before making his way back to the middle of the cafe. He was walking on three paws, saving his black and grimy paw for something special.

Matcha's eyes darted towards Elizabeth who he regarded as the most popular cat in the cafe. Currently, Elizabeth was surrounded by a huddle of girls. Matcha slid Elizabeth a sly grin as he whispered to himself, "Elizabeth is definitely my strongest competition for this contest. If I can get rid of her, my chances of winning will be as high as 90%!"

Time froze once again.

When time resumed, the girls surrounding Elizabeth burst out screaming in fear.

Coco Sun, who adored cosplay, donned on a traditional Chinese dress. As the intense stench radiated from Elizabeth, her face instantly turned green as she screamed, "What's that smell? Who shat on their pants?"

One of the girls pointed her finger at Elizabeth and shouted, "Look! There is shit smeared all over Elizabeth's butt!"

Matcha, who was hiding at the corner of the cafe, burst out laughing at this scene. He was busy applauding himself for this perfect plan as he thought, "Hmph, what's the use of looking so cute when you have shit smeared all over your ass? Who will even like you?"

Because of Matcha's action, Elizabeth's popularity for the day plummeted. Seeing Elizabeth lying alone in the cafe, without any of her fans, sent Matcha jumping with joy. He could not wait for the results of the night's star cat competition.

Once they returned home, Hanako sat on the chair and began tallying the votes for this widely-anticipated competition. A smug smile reflected off Matcha's face as he eagerly awaited the results.

He took a look at his reflection as he seductively licked his snow-white paws, before running his saliva-stained paw through his fur. He even hummed his favorite song while looking at his handsome reflection, "Why do birds suddenly appear … Every time, I am near … Just like you, they long to be … close to me."

Finally, it was the moment Matcha had been waiting for. Hanako stood from her seat and announced, "After rounds of tallying, the winner goes to Elizabeth!"

"What!" Matcha sprang down from the table, fuming with anger. He ran towards Hanako's feet and demanded, "How is that possible? How can a cat with shit smeared on her butt get first? Conspiracy! There must be some sort of conspiracy!"

Zhao Yao who was busy having his dinner simply threw Matcha off the dining table and complained, "Shut up, you're affecting my dinner."

"Zhao Yao!" Matcha put on his most pitiful face as he pounced onto Zhao Yao's calf. He screamed, "There must be a conspiracy! Someone had stolen my title!"

Zhao Yao's eyebrows shot upward as he sneered, "You only won the first competition because you took part in my splendid performance. Because of the renovation, the competition for the second month was postponed. It's natural for Elizabeth to win the competition for this month."

"Why? Matcha screamed.

Zhao Yao just blurted whatever came to his mind, "She's the only ragdoll in the entire cafe, that's why."

Matcha could not believe his ears and lamented, "Just because she is a ragdoll? But I am a Jiangmen Fold! I can't even compare to a cat with shit on her fur?"

Zhao Yao replied with a nod of his head.

"No!" Matcha collapsed to the ground and protested, "I do not concur! How can she win solely based on her bloodline? I must defy the odds! My destiny is in my hands! I shall prevail!"

Roly Poly, who was resting in the corner of the living room, observed this pathetic scene and sniggered secretly, "This silly cat. Does he actually think that he stands a chance against me?"

He slid Matcha a condescending glare before fixing his attention on his real mission. His eyes swept towards Mango as he exclaimed, "Mango, Mango! It's time for dinner! Come here for dinner!"

Mango blinked his eyes adorably before racing toward Roly Poly.

Roly Poly was bursting with excitement when he saw Mango running towards him. He retrieved a cat snack from his stash and threw it in front of Mango. Mango instantly devoured it happily.

"Success! Finally, Mango has reacted to my calls!" After days of training, Mango seemed to be able to recognize his own name.

Roly Poly's eyes gravitated towards his phone screen as he read, "Remember to call your cat's name before feeding it. This will teach your cat to recognize its own name. Hmph, I have done this already!" His paws swept upwards as he continued reading.

"When your cat responds to your calling, you must reciprocate with food as a reward. You can give it a gentle massage on its spine. Continue feeding it while calling its name. This would allow your cat to connect its name to the food. If your cat does not struggle when you touch it, this means that your cat has already acknowledged you …"

After reading the paragraph, Roly Poly instantly put his learning into action. He screamed for Mango as he threw another handful of cat snacks onto the floor.

While Mango was busy wiping the food off the floor, Roly Poly made use of the opportunity to give Mango a massage.

"That's great, Mango did not run away!" Roly Poly was engrossed in his daydreams as his paw continued running across Mango's fur, "This is great! The information on the internet is so useful! As long as I persevere, I'll be able to add this invincible general to my side."

While Roly Poly was busy daydreaming, his nails accidentally scratched against Mango's skin which caused him to turn around and run away.

"This stupid cat." Roly Poly muttered as he pounded angrily on his chest before continuing his research.

"Never hit your cat if your cat ever bites you. You can scream to let it know that it hurts."

"D*mn it, who wrote this stupid instruction!" Roly Poly tried his best to suppress his anger and thought, "I guess there's still a long way to go before I'm done with Mango."

Meanwhile, Zhao Yao immediately collapsed on the couch after finishing his dinner. Today was the end of the month, which meant that it was time for him to reap the harvest of his missions.